I've been playing the game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
It's not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course - you just follow the wounded. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Vice President Spiro Agnew can not cheat on his score : because all you have to do is look back down the… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
The last time I played golf with President Ford he hit a birdie. And an eagle, a moose, an elk, an aardvark... — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Gerry Ford is easy to spot on the course. He drives the cart with the red cross painted on top. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Foursomes have left the first tee there and have never been seen again. They just find their shoelaces and bags. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome - the President, myself, a paramedic and a… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Golf's really fun in Japan because of the women caddies. ... I saw one guy start out playing alone with his caddie.… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Golf is a hard game to figure. One day you will go out and slice it and shank it, hit into all… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Golf is a funny game. It's done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Jimmy Stewart could have been a good golfer, but he speaks so slowly that by the time he yells 'Fore!' the guy… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Cypress Point is such a beautiful place, but it's also very exclusive. They had a very successful membership drive last month. They… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Having so many gold courses so close together was ideal for me. With my slice I could enjoy three or four golf… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I've been playing golf a long time, although it's not really true that on my first round they strapped my bag on… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I get upset over a bad shot just like anyone else. But it's silly to let the game get to you. When… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I never kick my ball in the rough or improve my lie in a sand trap. For that I have a caddie. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
If he slices the budget like he slices a golf ball, the nation has nothing to worry about. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
My old friend Jack Benny has only had one ball all his golfing life. And now he's lost it. The string came… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I do try to work out a little. I go swimming twice a day. It beats buying golf balls. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
It was a great honour to be inducted into the Hall of Fame. I didn't know they had a caddie division. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
US President Gerald Ford's golf was so bad we thought he was a 'Hitman for the PGA! — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and… — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I just hope I don't have to explain all the times I've used His name in vain when I get up there. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
Arnold Palmer is the biggest crowd pleaser since the invention of the portable sanitary facility. — Bob Hope Copy Share Image
I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. — Bob Hope Copy Share
Having so many gold courses so close together was ideal for me. With my slice I could enjoy three or four golf courses at… — Bob Hope Copy Share
Contrary to what certain comedians have led you to believe, the national French pastime is picnicking. — Bob Hope Copy Share
She spoke perfect English, which led to considerable trouble. She couldn't understand us at all. — Bob Hope Copy Share
My father told me all about the birds and the bees, the liar - I went steady with a woodpecker till I was twenty… — Bob Hope Copy Share
I need money. I have a staff of 30, and four houses, never mind the government, to support. — Bob Hope Copy Share
In England when you make a movie even the weather is against you. In Hollywood the weatherman gets a shooting schedule from all the… — Bob Hope Copy Share
Go figure a crazy, mixed-up country where ballet outsells boxing. I wouldn't be surprised if their wrestling was on the level. — Bob Hope Copy Share
Bing Crosby and I play a lot of golf together and I have a small course at my place where we often play for… — Bob Hope Copy Share
I was lucky, you know, I always had a beautiful girl and the money was good. Although I would have done the whole thing… — Bob Hope Copy Share
You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra, I… — Bob Hope Copy Share
