How we feel about our kids isn't as important as how they experience those feelings and how they regard the way we… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
If children feel safe, they can take risks, ask questions, make mistakes, learn to trust, share their feelings, and grow. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
Unconditional parenting: Moving from Rewards and Punishments to Love and Reason — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
If a child is off-task...mayb e the problem is not the child...maybe it's the task. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
Children, after all, are not just adults-in-the-making. They are people whose current needs and rights and experiences must be taken seriously. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
Children learn how to make good decisions by making decisions, not by following directions. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
“The more we want our children to be (1) lifelong learners, genuinely excited about words and numbers and ideas, (2) avoid sticking… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
You have to give them unconditional love. They need to know that even if they screw up, you love them. You don't… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
Most of us would protest that of course we love our children without any strings attached. But what counts is how things… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
Sometimes we have to put our foot down, ... but before we deliberately make children unhappy in order to get them to… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
Some who support [more] coercive strategies assume that children will run wild if they are not controlled. However, the children for whom… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
“So what, exactly, is the positive reinforcement that’s being suspended when a child is given a time-out? Sometimes he’s doing something fun… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
“Even before i had children, I knew that being a parent was going to be challenging as well as rewarding. But I… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
“In my experience, most parents sincerely want their children to be assertive, independent thinkers who are unafraid to stand their ground .… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
“It’s been said that the personal is political, and there’s no doubt that parenting is intensely personal. To argue against traditional ways… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share Image
“Many of our elected officials have virtually handed the keys to our schools over to corporate interests. Presidential commissions on education are commonly chaired… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
“a grade can be regarded only as an inadequate report of an inaccurate judgment by a biased and variable judge of the extent to… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
In some suburban schools, the curriculum is chock-full of rigorous A.P. courses and the parking lot glitters with pricey SUVs, but one doesn't have… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
Standardized testing has swelled and mutated, like a creature in one of those old horror movies, to the point that it now threatens to… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
If a child is off-task...mayb e the problem is not the child...maybe it's the task. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
If unconditional love and genuine enthusiasm are present, praise isn't necessary. If they're absent, praise won't help. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
Most of us would protest that of course we love our children without any strings attached. But what counts is how things look from… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
What can we surmise about the likelihood of someone's being caring and generous, loving and helpful, just from knowing that they are a believer?… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
Punishment and reward proceed from basically the same psychological model, one that conceives of motivation as nothing more than the manipulation of behavior. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
Each time I visit such a classroom, where the teacher is more interested in creating a democratic community than in maintaining her position of… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
Educators remind us that what counts in a classroom is not what the teacher teaches; it’s what the learner learns. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
In short, with each of the thousand-and-one problems that present themselves in family life, our choice is between controlling and teaching, between creating an… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
To control students is to force them to accommodate to a preestablished curriculum. — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
“But as I mastered the material, homework ceased to be necessary. A no homework policy is a challenge to me," he adds. "I am… — Alfie Kohn Copy Share
![“Some who support [more] coercive strategies assume that children will run wild if they are not controlled. However, the children for whom this is true typically turn out to be those accustomed to being controlled— those who are not trusted, given explanations, encouraged to think for themselves…” quote by Alfie Kohn](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/8de/alfie-kohn-7728_assuming_some-who-support-more-coercive-strategie_1697882.jpg)
