"Christmas begins about the first of December with……" — P.J. O'Rourke
"Christmas begins about the first of December with an office party and ends when you finally realize what you spent, around April fifteenth of the next year."
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P.J. O'Rourke
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578 Quotes by P.J. O'Rourke
P.J. O'Rourke has 578 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Marijuana is self-punishing. It makes you acutely sensitive, and in this world, what worse punishment could there be?
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Getting down on all fours and imitating a rhinoceros stops babies from crying. (Put an empty cigarette pack on your…
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Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.
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The neo-hippie-dips, the sentimentality-crazed iguana anthropomorphizers, the Chicken Littles, the three-bong-hit William Blakes- thank God these people don't actually go…
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There is only one basic human right: the right to do as you please, without causing others harm. With it…
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A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them.
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Violence is interesting. This is a great obstacle to world peace and also to more thoughtful television programming.
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Anyhow, all mankind's ideas and interests, all human aims and motives, are exhibited, fully formed, in a three-year-old child. The…
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Zen martini: A martini with no vermouth at all. And no gin, either.
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Remember, your body needs 6 to 8 glasses of fluid daily. Straight up or on the rocks.
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Whatever the occasion, do not neglect alcohol. No other refreshment will do. Yes, alcohol kills brain cells, but it's very…
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You can smoke or drink on a golf course without interrupting the game, and you can take a leak -…
See all 578 quotes by P.J. O'Rourke »
More April Quotes
This quote is filed under April Quotes,
one of 309 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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In April 1991, after the Gulf war, Iraq was given 15 days to provide a full and final declaration of…
— Tony Blair
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April is a promise that May is bound to keep.
— Hal Borland
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Oh, to be in England now that April's there.
— Robert Browning
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There is no glory in star or blossom till looked upon by a loving eye; There is no fragrance in…
— William C. Bryant
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I started this charity, Fashion for Relief, in 2005, after Hurricane Katrina happened. New Orleans was actually the first place…
— Naomi Campbell
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I gave birth to my first son in April 1986. I thought it would be a good goal to get…
— Kim Alexis
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Long stormy spring-time, wet contentious April, winter chilling the lap of very May; but at length the season of summer…
— Thomas Carlyle
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In April 2006, a Dutch court ordered that I leave my safe-home that I was renting from the State. The…
— Ayaan Hirsi Ali
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"I call them april babies cause they fools"
— Lil Wayne
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The peoples of Islam will always be closer to us than, for example, France. (2nd April 1945)
— Adolf Hitler
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With the defeat of the Reich and pending the emergence of the Asiatic, the African and, perhaps, the South American…
— Adolf Hitler
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Oh, how this spring of love resembleth, The uncertain glory of an April day, Which now shows all beauty of…
— William Shakespeare
See all 309 April Quotes »