Empathy Quote by Paul Graham
““When I was a kid I was constantly being told to look at things from someone else’s point of view. What this always meant in practice was to do what someone else wanted, instead of what I wanted. This of course gave empathy a bad name, and I made a point of not cultivating it. Boy, was I wrong. It turns out that looking at things from other people’s point of view is practically the secret of success. Empathy doesn’t necessarily mean being self-sacrificing. Far from it. Understanding how someone else sees things doesn’t imply that you’ll act in his interest; in some situations — in war, for example — you want to do exactly the opposite.””
About This Quote
Source Essay: "Empathy and Success", 2015
Seeing from others' perspectives is a powerful tool for success, not synonymous with self‑sacrifice; it can guide strategy even in conflict.
In simple terms: Perspective taking aids success without losing self‑interest.
Key Takeaway
Practice perspective taking strategically.
Themes
empathy
strategy
perspective
Mood
reflective
critical
Type
philosophical
practical
When to use this quote
- business negotiations
- team management
- diplomacy
- war planning
Key Concepts
psychology
leadership
conflict resolution
Questions to Reflect On
- When does perspective taking become manipulation?
- How to balance empathy with self‑interest?
A Different Perspective
Empathy may be misused to manipulate.
![“That is another theme in the book [Dreams from My Father]. How do we exercise more empathy in our public discourse? How do we get the black to see through the eyes of the white? Or the citizen to see through the eyes of the immigrant? Or the straight to see through the eyes of the gay? That has…” quote by Barack Obama](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/00d/barack-obama-17_black_that-is-another-theme-in-the-book-dreams_10185.jpg)
