Best Waiter Sayings

150 Waiter quotes by 130 unique authors

I've never been in love... But I imagine it's similar to the feeling you get when you see your waiter arriving with your food — Zach Galifianakis
I don't trust valets, waiters — nobody. I don't waste my time anymore trying to figure out who leaks things to the press. — Nicole Richie
Foreign diplomats could have modeled their conduct on the way the Negro postmen, Pullman porters, and dining car waiters of Roxbury [Massachusetts] acted, striding around… — Malcolm X
I like L.A. It's like a mini break. For a writer, it's hilarious. Like the food. Where I come from, we eat chip sandwiches: white… — Helen Fielding
Steakhouses sort of have this old-school nature to them; they're like museums full of good food. It's fun hearing the waiter share his expertise on… — Jim Gaffigan
I did a dance sequence in my second short film, which was my best short film, called 'Hairway to the Stars,' and I think Chris… — David O. Russell
I was afraid to board a streetcar because of the conductor; I was afraid to enter the Kabuki Theater for fear of the usherettes standing… — Osamu Dazai
My father was a waiter basically, and when I got my first professional job as an actor, I left a job that he found me… — Alfred Molina
Well, isn't Bohemia a place where everyone is as good as everyone else - and must not a waiter be a little less than a… — Djuna Barnes
I mean, I've had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort of logic error… — Todd Barry
I've never had to get a job as a waiter or anything. I've always been able to support myself in 'the biz.' Which is great.… — Paul Feig
I have been working since I was 20, and I'm 38. I actually once averaged out what I had made over my professional life. I… — Sebastian Junger
To go to the Oscars for Moneyball - that was pretty amazing. And to be able to go work with Kathryn Bigelow - that's going… — Chris Pratt
From being a waiter, to a door-to-door salesman, to a car-washer, to a delivery boy - I have done it all. — Randeep Hooda
When I talk about my husband, I feel as if people roll their eyes. It's like when you're 16 and order a martini, and the… — Megan Fox
Now, if you are like me - if you are like practically anybody in America - then you probably hold some negative opinions about the… — Elizabeth Gilbert
I went into a French restaraunt and asked the waiter, 'Have you got frog's legs?' He said, 'Yes,' so I said, 'Well hop into the… — Tommy Cooper
With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to 'the best woman a man ever had.' The waiter… — Rodney Dangerfield
I asked the waiter, 'Is this milk fresh?' He said, 'Lady, three hours ago it was grass.' — Phyllis Diller
I'm an assistant storyteller. It's like being a waiter or a gas-station attendant, but I'm waiting on six million people a week, if I'm lucky. — Jane Fonda
A man needs to be polite, not just to me but to everyone. I watch that. How does he treat the waiter? How does he… — Adriana Lima
I worked as a waiter when I was 15 and got a chance to appreciate good, simple food. There's nothing better than a boiled egg… — Ewan McGregor
When those waiters ask me if I want some fresh ground pepper, I ask if they have any aged pepper. — Andy Rooney
My indifference to money and my spendthrift ways are disgraceful. You have no idea how reckless I am; how often I practically throw money out… — Robert Schumann
A diplomat these days in nothing, but a head waiter who is allowed to sit down occasionally. — Peter Ustinov

Who Wrote These Waiter Quotes

130 authors contributed a total of 150 Waiter Quotes, led by these top contributors:

Best Waiter Sayings

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