Best Toilet Qoutes

407 Toilet quotes by 303 unique authors

When I was on the swim team as a kid, I used to hide out from my coach by going into the bathroom and hiding… — Jeff Kinney
The Pacific is the best toilet for satellites. — Neil deGrasse Tyson
No innovation in the past 200 years has done more to save lives and improve health than the sanitation revolution triggered by invention of the… — Sylvia Mathews Burwell
I decided to build a studio in my house. We built it in my basement kitchen. I had the drummer up by the fish tank.… — Eddi Reader
The first thing I did when I decided that I was going to dive into the world of poop was look at who was doing… — Rose George
The average human being spends three years of life going to the toilet, though the average human being with no physical toilet to go to… — Rose George
Rules governing defecation, hygiene, and pollution exist in every culture at every period in history. It may in fact be the foundation of civilization: What… — Rose George
I, made in England, felt excluded, miffed, resistant to the idea of even visiting India, a position of increasing absurdity as, one by one, backpacking… — Glen Duncan
In many parts of the world, more people have access to a mobile device than to a toilet or running water. — Nancy Gibbs
In the case of the classic Western helicopter parent, it starts with Baby Einstein and reward charts for toilet training, and it never really ends,… — Nancy Gibbs
One time I tried to use the bathroom in the dark, and I missed the toilet, and I fell on the floor. — Rita Ora
I have said with as much sincerity as I can muster that if I were thrown into a dungeon with a sentence of one hundred… — Edward P. Jones
Rightly or wrongly, the Victorian considered that there were certain subjects which were not meet for inter-sexual discussion, just as they held that certain processes… — Edward Frederic Benson
When someone follows you all the way to the shop and watches you buy toilet roll, you know your life has changed. — Jennifer Aniston
You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet. — Alan King
I think the bottom line for me and for Newsweek is that there were a lot of - we did retract this specific matter about… — Michael Isikoff
The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time. — Bob Monkhouse
Just casually taking selfies on the toilet. — Zach
I just got a tattoo of a toilet on my chest, when I take off my shirt you better recognize that I'm the shit. — Nikhil Saluja
I don't flush the toilet after I poop because I'm really into marketing my brand. — Nikhil Saluja
It's so funny that I mostly keep calm and thinki about life when I'm on the toilet — Simphiwe Scientist Dumi
Call your toilet out so when someone asks you what you did today, it sounds that you actually have a life and went out. You're… — Nikhil Saluja
You know it's true love when you find youself saying sweet things you never imagined you'd say like baby, I warmed the toilet seat for… — Nikhil Saluja
I just want to be rich enough to where I can wipe my ass with toilet paper. — Nikhil Saluja
Leaving hairs on a toilet seat is like a little gift, from one ass to another. — Nikhil Saluja

Who Wrote These Toilet Quotes

303 authors contributed a total of 407 Toilet Quotes, led by these top contributors:

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