Mother-In-Law Quotes
30 Mother-In-Law quotes by 20 unique authors
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Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel.
— Josh Billings
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I have a great relationship with my mother-in-law. We're both Leos, we understand each other.
— Tori Amos
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A mother-in-law is better than a single and childless political persona, though.
— Vladimir Zhirinovsky
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My mother-in-law was with me during all four of my births and when she was sitting next to me holding my hand during the cesareans,…
— Patricia Heaton
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My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind.
— Les Dawson
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My mother-in-law's so fat that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it.
— Les Dawson
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I know my mother-in-law would drive two hours to go see a movie that I'm in.
— Melanie Lynskey
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I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.'
— Les Dawson
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My mother-in-law has come round to our house at Christmas seven years running. This year we're having a change. We're going to let her in.
— Les Dawson
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I'm often accused of saying some pretty rotten things about my mother-in-law. But quite honestly, she's only got one major fault - it's called breathing.
— Les Dawson
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The mother-in-law is the centre of a family.
— Les Dawson
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I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said: 'Keep her moving sir; we're stock-taking.'
— Les Dawson
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The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said, 'Mother,…
— Les Dawson
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed; I never knew they worked.
— Les Dawson
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The mother-in-law had an accident at work. A hot rivet dropped down her drawers and she fell off the oil rig.
— Les Dawson
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My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee.
— Phyllis Diller
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Behind every successful man is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law.
— Hubert H. Humphrey
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Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
— H. L. Mencken
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I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the hell off my property.'
— Joan Rivers
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I cook mostly vegetarian vegetable and bean stews. Quinoa salads. I make my mother-in-law's recipe for chicken and barley stew all the time.
— Gail Simmons
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I went from resenting my mother-in-law to accepting her, finally to appreciating her. What appeared to be her diffidence when I was first married, I…
— Ayelet Waldman
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The only thing more intimidating than a huge international film star is your mother-in-law.
— Benjamin Walker
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Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport.
— Henny Youngman
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A car is like a mother-in-law - if you let it, it will rule your life.
— Jaime Lerner
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My mother-in-law, Nanny, spent her working years as a bookkeeper at a medical office in Columbus, Ohio. Like so many Americans, she worked hard and…
— Ann McLane Kuster
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Who Wrote These Mother-In-Law Quotes
20 authors contributed a total of 30 Mother-In-Law Quotes as follows: