Mother-In-Law Quotes

30 Mother-In-Law quotes by 20 unique authors

• Be kind to your mother-in-law, but pay for her board at some good hotel. — Josh Billings
• I have a great relationship with my mother-in-law. We're both Leos, we understand each other. — Tori Amos
• A mother-in-law is better than a single and childless political persona, though. — Vladimir Zhirinovsky
• My mother-in-law was with me during all four of my births and when she was sitting next to me holding my hand during the cesareans,… — Patricia Heaton
• My mother-in-law has so many wrinkles, when she smiles she looks like a Venetian blind. — Les Dawson
• My mother-in-law's so fat that when she passes her handbag from hand to hand she throws it. — Les Dawson
• I know my mother-in-law would drive two hours to go see a movie that I'm in. — Melanie Lynskey
• I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.' — Les Dawson
• My mother-in-law has come round to our house at Christmas seven years running. This year we're having a change. We're going to let her in. — Les Dawson
• I'm often accused of saying some pretty rotten things about my mother-in-law. But quite honestly, she's only got one major fault - it's called breathing. — Les Dawson
• The mother-in-law is the centre of a family. — Les Dawson
• I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said: 'Keep her moving sir; we're stock-taking.' — Les Dawson
• The mother-in-law came round last week. It was absolutely pouring down. So I opened the door and I saw her there and I said, 'Mother,… — Les Dawson
• My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed; I never knew they worked. — Les Dawson
• The mother-in-law had an accident at work. A hot rivet dropped down her drawers and she fell off the oil rig. — Les Dawson
• My mother-in-law had a pain beneath her left breast. Turned out to be a trick knee. — Phyllis Diller
• Behind every successful man is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law. — Hubert H. Humphrey
• Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends. — H. L. Mencken
• I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the hell off my property.' — Joan Rivers
• I cook mostly vegetarian vegetable and bean stews. Quinoa salads. I make my mother-in-law's recipe for chicken and barley stew all the time. — Gail Simmons
• I went from resenting my mother-in-law to accepting her, finally to appreciating her. What appeared to be her diffidence when I was first married, I… — Ayelet Waldman
• The only thing more intimidating than a huge international film star is your mother-in-law. — Benjamin Walker
• Just got back from a pleasure trip: I took my mother-in-law to the airport. — Henny Youngman
• A car is like a mother-in-law - if you let it, it will rule your life. — Jaime Lerner
• My mother-in-law, Nanny, spent her working years as a bookkeeper at a medical office in Columbus, Ohio. Like so many Americans, she worked hard and… — Ann McLane Kuster

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Who Wrote These Mother-In-Law Quotes

20 authors contributed a total of 30 Mother-In-Law Quotes as follows:

• 10 Mother-In-Law Quotes by Les Dawson
• 2 Mother-In-Law Quotes by Hubert H. Humphrey
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Wilbur Smith
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Vladimir Zhirinovsky
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Vikrant Parsai
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Unknown Author
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Tori Amos
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Phyllis Diller
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Patricia Heaton
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Melanie Lynskey
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Josh Billings
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Joan Rivers
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Jerome K. Jerome
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Jaime Lerner
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Henny Youngman
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by H. L. Mencken
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Gail Simmons
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Benjamin Walker
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Ayelet Waldman
• 1 Mother-In-Law Quote by Ann McLane Kuster