Books Quote by Bell Hooks
““When we feel deeply drawn to someone, we cathect them; that is, we invest feelings or emotion in them. That process of investment wherein a loved one becomes important to us is called "cathexis". I his book Peck rightly emphasizes that most of us "confuse cathecting with loving." We all know how often individuals of cathecting insist that they love the other person even if they are hurting of neglecting them. Since their feiling is that of cathexis, they insist that what they feel is love. When we understand love as the will to nurture our own and another's spiritual growth, it becomes clear that we cannot claim to love if we are hurtful and abusive.””
About This Quote
Source Book: All About Love by Bell Hooks, 2004
Distinguishes genuine love from mere emotional investment, emphasizing nurturing growth over selfish attachment.
In simple terms: Love is about mutual growth, not just feeling.
Key Takeaway
Prioritize nurturing over possessive feelings.
Themes
love
psychology
relationships
Mood
reflective
empathetic
Type
philosophical
educational
When to use this quote
- romantic partnerships
- friendships
- family dynamics
- therapy sessions
Key Concepts
cathexis
attachment theory
emotional intelligence
Questions to Reflect On
- What signs show love is nurturing rather than possessive?
- How can you foster growth in relationships?
A Different Perspective
Confusing attachment with love can lead to unhealthy relationships.
![“Affection is only one ingredient of love. To truly love we must learn to mix various ingredients -- care, affection, recognition, respect, commitment, and trust, as well as honest and open communication. [...] When we feel deeply drawn to someone, we cathect with them; that is, we invest feelings…” quote by bell hooks](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/f5b/bell-hooks-464_love_affection-is-only-one-ingredient-of-love_1238112.jpg)
