Snooki Quotes

62 quotes in 517 categories

• I am tanned; I like being tanned, BITCH!
• I haven't had sex in like four months. Right now I need to be smushing!
• Everybody Google it, because that's why the water is salty. Fucking whale sperm.
• I'm a fucking good person!
• I feel like I'm gonna be like a tornado. I'm just gonna go from place to place like destroying it.
• I got a boner.
• I don't go tanning tanning anymore because Obama put a 10% tax on tanning. I feel like he did that intentionally for us, like McCain…
• Every time I get excited I have to poop.
• Eating fried pickles was a life changing experience.
• I really don't want to cheat, like seriously, I don't want to.. but if youre gonna hand me a bottle of friggin' SoCo, something just…
• I love food. I love drinking, boys, dancing until my feet swell. I love my family, my friends, my job, my boss. And I love…
• Old people they lose their sex life and that's not a good time. That's why they get divorced all the time.
• Oh my God! Someone needs to kiss my ass asap!
• I will pee in a bush, I will shit in a bush, I will hide in a bush.
• Even though we're tiny bitches I don't give a shit. I will fucking attack you like a squirrel monkey.
• Seriously like who pee's in a bar?
• I call my vibrator the Elmo, because you know like tickle me Elmo
• Lol so I'm the asshole in the bathroom that can't get the motion censored water and soap to come out and waving my hand for…
• You haven't see nothing yet till' you see me at the JERSEY FUCKING SHORE! Seeya later mum!
• I swear on my cat's grave.

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