Mason Cooley

Sincerity guarantees nothing but itself.

— Mason Cooley

Everything changes as it is written down.

— Mason Cooley

Money is a better tonic than Geritol.

— Mason Cooley

Like love, destruction can be ecstatic.

— Mason Cooley

Many try to force the past to change.

— Mason Cooley

The truths I shun follow me, mumbling.

— Mason Cooley

Sign at the orgy: BODIES ONLY.

— Mason Cooley

The powerless worship Luck and Fate.

— Mason Cooley

In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. Mason Cooley

— Mason Cooley

By multiplying ironies, I evade commitments.

— Mason Cooley

Talk shows are proof that conversation is dead.

— Mason Cooley

History goes out of control almost as often as nature does.

— Mason Cooley

Like an electric tea-kettle, pornography comes to a boil very fast.

— Mason Cooley

A sense of absurdity interferes with my efforts to appear venerable.

— Mason Cooley

When I go out, I hope to leave the worst of myself at home.

— Mason Cooley

Lies and promises are necessary but not sufficient.

— Mason Cooley

Curiosity, easily frightened, takes refuge in puzzles, murder mysteries, and spectator sports.

— Mason Cooley

If you have no power, talk about your influence. If you have power, talk about the constraints that hem you in.

— Mason Cooley

Like a frog, the aphorist waits for something to fly by that he can catch with his tongue.

— Mason Cooley

My father liked to moralize, and so do I. But he was in earnest, while I am embarrassed and pretend that I…

— Mason Cooley

In New York, pretending to be above the struggle means no seat on the bus and a table next to the kitchen.

— Mason Cooley

Was there a little time between the invention of language and the coming of true and false?

— Mason Cooley

Nobody knows the trouble I've seen: even less, the trouble I've successfully avoided.

— Mason Cooley

Forgetting and remembering are governed by laws, but we cannot find out what they are.

— Mason Cooley

Grandiosity lessens as work proceeds.

— Mason Cooley

Later is always my first choice.

— Mason Cooley

As soon as I hear of a right, I want it

— Mason Cooley

Our troubles keep us going.

— Mason Cooley

Life is the risk we cannot refuse.

— Mason Cooley

Boredom makes me sleepy or restless.

— Mason Cooley

Doubt is long-winded. Certainty is brief.

— Mason Cooley

Publish in haste and repent at leisure.

— Mason Cooley

Moderation shifts when extremes do.

— Mason Cooley

Desire is wakeful; satisfaction dozes.

— Mason Cooley

Sloth, not ill-will, makes me unjust.

— Mason Cooley

The body has a mind of its own.

— Mason Cooley

As night falls, every joy glows brighter.

— Mason Cooley

Wit puts politicians at risk.

— Mason Cooley

Truth is a necessary phantom.

— Mason Cooley

The beginning sets the rules.

— Mason Cooley