Having a normal person around me made it poingnantly clear to me that I was out of control. — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
Starvation is incredibly frightening when it finally sets in with a vengeance. And when it does,you are surprised. You hadn't meant this.… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
Me and my needs were driving my mother away. Me and my needs retreated to my closet, disappeared into fairy tales. I… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
Never, never underestimate the power of desire. If you want to live badly enough, you can live. The great question, at least… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
He leaned down and whispered to me: No matter how thin you get, no matter how short you cut your hair, it's… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
I think many people with a chronic illness would prefer not to have their chronic illness, simply because it's high maintenance. — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
...Someone speaks in soft tones to me and says I am psychotic, but it's going to be all right. I put on… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
When you are mad, mad like this, you don't know it. Reality is what you see. When what you see shifts, departing… — Marya Hornbacher Bipolar Copy Share Image
You wake up one morning and there it is, sitting in an old plaid bathrobe in your kitchen, unpleasant and unshaved. You… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
“And so i went through the looking glass, stepped into the nether world, where up is down and food is greed, where… — Marya Hornbacher Death Copy Share Image
This is the very boring part of eating disorders, the aftermath. When you eat and hate that you eat. And yet of… — Marya Hornbacher Aftermath Copy Share Image
I have not lost my fascination with death. I have not become a noticeably less intense person. I have not, nor will… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
My relationships with both my mother and father are good. We spent several difficult years hashing over the problems and the past,… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
I am often drawn to what appear at first to be 'dark' or 'difficult' subjects, but which, upon further examination, are always… — Marya Hornbacher Dark Copy Share Image
When you're teaching creative nonfiction, it helps to have written about your life in a very open way, because you can say,… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
We think of bulimia and anorexia as either a bizarre psychosis, or as a quirky little habit, a phase, or as a… — Marya Hornbacher Anorexia Copy Share Image
There was a time when I was unable to get out of bed because my body, its muscles eating themselves away, refused… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
“Forgetting who you are and where you are and if you're there. Getting lost in the thought that you might be imagining… — Marya Hornbacher Getting lost Copy Share Image
“As winter went on, longer than long, we both freaked out. My mania grew to insane proportions. I sat in the study… — Marya Hornbacher Drinking tea Copy Share Image
“I didn't particularly want to live much longer than that. Life seemed rather daunting. It seems so to me even now. Life… — Marya Hornbacher Life Copy Share Image
“Something had been confirmed: I was worth giving a shit about; I was getting to be a successful sick person. Sick is… — Marya Hornbacher Death Copy Share Image
“Uncle Joe used to spend a fair amount of time in the loony bin. My family wasn't bothered by his regular trips… — Marya Hornbacher Time Copy Share Image
“It's never over. Not really. Not when you stay down there as long as I did, not when you've lived in the… — Marya Hornbacher Elementary school Copy Share Image
I was perpetually grief-stricken when I finished a book, and would slide down from my sitting position on the bed, put my… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
“There are a lot of times the heart burrows deeper, goes tunnelling into itself for reasons only the heart itself seems to… — Marya Hornbacher Addiction Copy Share Image
“The spiritual realm is not the ethereal beyond our lived experience. It is our experience, lived fully and well.” — Marya Hornbacher Religion Copy Share Image
That nothing - not booze, not love, not sex, not work, not moving from state to state - will make the past… — Marya Hornbacher Booze Copy Share Image
You can't teach an ear, you can't teach talent, but you can teach people who have those things not to just fly… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
We were at another funeral party. I wasn’t sure who had died this time, but it was a suicide, and upsetting because… — Marya Hornbacher Funeral Copy Share Image
I wish I could find words to explain what this kind of cold is like- the cold that has somehow gotten in… — Marya Hornbacher Cold Copy Share Image
“I was used to sleeping with people because I endlessly found myself in identical situations where it was easier to just fuck… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
You will miss her sometimes. Bear in mind she's trying to kill you. Bear in mind you have a life to live. — Marya Hornbacher Anorexia Copy Share Image
“No matter how thin you get, no matter how short you cut your hair, it's still going to be you underneath.” — Marya Hornbacher Anorexia Copy Share Image
It is, at the most basic level, a bundle of contradictions: a desire for power that strips you of all power. A… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
Madness strips you of memory and leaves you scrabbling around on the floor of your brain for the snatches and snippets of… — Marya Hornbacher Brain Copy Share Image
The term “starvation diet” refers to 900 calories a day. I was on one-third of a starvation diet. What do you call… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
I grew into it. It grew into me. It and I blurred at the edges, became one amorphous, seeping, crawling thing. — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
All of us have theories about the world and about ourselves. We will go to great lengths to prove ourselves right because… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
“As I head back up the stairs, I hear the dryer make a sound of great mechanical distress, nnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee , and I… — Marya Hornbacher Computers Copy Share Image
“Sitting out there on the porch, I laughed. How funny—to think of us turning our clocks this way and that, importantly telling… — Marya Hornbacher Copy Share Image
