All Jimmy Kimmel Quotes
- I only get unusual ailments. Ailments
- I have like fifteen televisions in my house. Fifteen
- My aunt and uncle are clearly civilians. Aunt
- Real emotion is good - or doing a good job of faking real emotion. Emotion
- No matter who it is, I hate to see people losing their jobs. I really do. Hate
- I describe myself as a human being. Describe
- I did not have any delusions of grandeur as a kid. Any
- I never imagined being on television. Imagined
- I have had a lot of experience in broadcasting. Broadcasting
- When you know someone you can make a little more fun of them without them getting offended. Fun
- You can say Pizza Hut is terrible pizza, but they also sell more pizzas than anybody else. Anybody
- Almost every week, someone's mad at me. Almost Every
- I'm a creative consultant, whatever that means. Consultant
- I'm a terrible golfer. Golfer
- It's funny how all of this has worked out - I wasn't popular in high school, but now every drunken guy in the United States… All
- That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't. Always Think
- There's an air of mystery around the Masons, but the reality is that they're mostly a bunch of veterans getting drunk in a lodge that… Air
- I go to Costco every weekend. It's my favorite part of the week. Costco
- Adam doesn't need a partner, the guy is just funny. He has a strong opinion on almost every topic. You can ask him about Sea-Monkeys… Adam
- What I said about Pistons fans during halftime was a joke, nothing more. If I offended anyone, I'm sorry. Clearly, over the past 10 years,… Anyone