All Jasper Fforde Quotes
- …Tell me, has anything odd happened to you recently? What do you mean, odd?' Unusual. Deviating from the customary. Something outside the usual parameters of… Customary
- If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher. Overlong, detailed to the point of distraction-and ultimately, without a major resolution. Book
- Goodness is weakness, pleasantness is poisonous, serenity is mediocrity and kindness is for losers. The best reason for committing loathsome and detestable acts – and… Acts
- Without unscrambled eggs, there was no time travel, no more depredation of the Now, and we could look to a brighter future of long-term thought--and… Brighter
- DCI Horner's advice to Jack Spratt: "Remember, m'boy," his old boss had said, eyes twinkling, "that if anyone tries to get the better of you,… Advice
- I'll tell you what love is" I said, "It is blind devotion, unquestioning self humiliation, utter submission, trust and belief against yourself and against the… Belief
- How many people want to read about three disreputable pigs and a dopey wolf with a disposition towards house demolition? Demolition
- The Goliath Corporation was to altruism what Genghis Khan was to soft furnishings. Altruism
- Ordinary adults don't like children to speak of things that are denied them by their own gray minds. Adults
- Religion isn't the cause of wars, it's the excuse. Cause
- Words are like leaves,. . .like people really, fond of their own society. Fond
- We all make mistakes at some time in our lives, some more than others. It is only when the cost is counted in human lives… All
- The barriers between reality and fiction are softer than we think; a bit like a frozen lake. Hundreds of people can walk across it, but… Across
- The cleanest souls are the easiest to soil. Cleanest
- Without a yardstick sometimes the high points can be taken for granted. Granted
- What is there to forgive?. . .Ignore forgive and concentrate on living. Life for you is short; far too short to allow small jealousies to… Allow
- Maybe those sorts of yes-or-no life-and-death decisions are easier to make because they are so black and white. I can cope with them because it's… Black
- We were developing a machine that used egg white, heat and sugar to synthesize methanol when a power surge caused an implosion. Owens was meringued.… Caused
- Cash is always the deciding factor in such matters of moral politics; nothing ever gets done unless motivated by commerce or greed. Capitalism
- Individual words, sounds, squiggles on paper with no meanings other than those with which our imagination can clothe them. Clothe
- I've got six months to sort out the hackers, get the Japanese knotweed under control and find an acceptable form of narcissus. Acceptable
- I didn't set out to discover a truth. I was actually sent to the Outer Fringes to conduct a chair census and learn some humility.… Actually Sent
- If you enjoyed laughing in the face of death, you might like to have a crack at High Saffron. One hundred merits, and all you… All
- The safest course was actually the simplest-do nothing at all and hope everything turned out for the best. It wasn't a great plan, but it… All
- The cucumber and the tomato are both fruit; the avocado is a nut. To assist with the dietary requirements of vegetarians, on the first Tuesday… Assist