Best Dorothy Parker Words
- Why is it no one sent me yet one perfect limousine, do you suppose? Ah no, it's always just my luck to get one perfect… Ah
- Four be the things I'd have been better without: love, curiosity, freckles and doubt. Been
- Mrs. Ewing was a short woman who accepted the obligation borne by so many short women to make up in vivacity what they lack in… Accepted
- That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment. Better
- Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both. Both
- You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think. Funny
- Ducking for apples -- change one letter and it's the story of my life. Apples
- She was pleased to have him come and never sorry to see him go. Go
- Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song, a medley of extemporanea, And love is a thing that can never go wrong, and I am… Cycle
- The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue. Brush
- I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings,… All
- By the time you swear you're his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this -- One… Broken Heart
- And there was that poor sucker Flaubert rolling around on his floor for three days looking for the right word. Days
- I don't know much about being a millionaire, but I'll bet I'd be darling at it. Bet
- I'm never going to accomplish anything; that's perfectly clear to me. I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on… Accomplish
- They say of me, and so they should, It's doubtful if I come to good. I see acquaintances and friends Accumulating dividends And making enviable… Accumulating
- Drink and dance and laugh and lie, Love, the reeling midnight through, For tomorrow we shall die! (But, alas, we never do.) Alas
- People Who Do Things exceed my endurance; God, for a man that solicits insurance! Endurance
- Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common. Common
- And if my heart be scarred and burned, The safer, I, for all I learned. All
- Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation. Arouses
- Her mind lives tidily, apart from cold and noise and pain. And bolts the door against her heart, out wailing in the rain. Apart
- Oh, seek, my love, your newer way; I'll not be left in sorrow. So long as I have yesterday, Go take your damned tomorrow! Damned
- Constant use had not worn ragged the fabric of their friendship. Constant
- It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your… Back One
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