Art Buchwald Quotes
71 quotes
in 1055 categories
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Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.
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Tax reform is taking the taxes off things that have been taxed in the past and putting taxes on things that haven't been taxed before.
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You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.
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Have you ever seen a candidate talking to a rich person on television?
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If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.
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This is a wonderful way to celebrate an 80th birthday... I wanted to be 65 again, but they wouldn't let me - Homeland Security.
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A bad liver is to a Frenchman what a nervous breakdown is to an American. Everyone has had one and everyone wants to talk about…
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The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile…
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The reason I don't play golf is because I was a caddie when I was 13. Women never gave up a golf ball that was…
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We seem to be going through a period of nostalgia, and everyone seems to think yesterday was better than today. I don't think it was,…
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When it came to writing about wine, I did what almost everybody does - faked it
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There isn't a child who hasn't gone out into the brave new world who eventually doesn't return to the old homestead carrying a bundle of…
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I like champagne because it always tastes as though my foot's asleep.
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Human beings thrive on action. Stagnation does not wear well with us. We are said to have our origins as hunter-gatherers. We run and we…
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Ascot is so exclusive that it is the only racecourse in the world where the horses own the people.
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I just don't want to die the same day Castro dies
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People are broad-minded. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater, and even a newspaperman, but…
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Every time you think television has hit its lowest ebb, a new program comes along to make you wonder where you thought the ebb was.
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I don't know whether this is the best of times or the worst of times, but I assure you it's the only time you've got.…
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I always wanted to get into politics, but I was never light enough to make the team.
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