Aliens Quote by Andrew Solomon
“Parenthood abruptly catapults us into a permanent relationship with a stranger, and the more alien the stranger, the stronger the whiff of negativity. We depend on the guarantee in our children's faces that we will not die. Children whose defining quality annihilates that fantasy of immortality are a particular insult; we must love them for themselves, and not for the best of ourselves in them, and that is a great deal harder to do. Loving our own children is an exercise for the imagination.”
About This Quote
Source Book: Far From the Tree by Andrew Solomon, 2012
Parenthood forces a deep, often uncomfortable bond with a child who is both familiar and foreign, challenging us to love them for who they are, not our idealized hopes.
In simple terms: Parenthood demands loving a child as they truly are, not as a projection of our desires.
Key Takeaway
Love the child, not the fantasy.
Themes
parenthood
love
identity
expectations
Mood
reflective
empathetic
Type
philosophical
inspirational
When to use this quote
- marriage
- raising children
- coping with disappointment
- self-reflection
Key Concepts
attachment theory
selflessness
imagination
Questions to Reflect On
- How do you separate your hopes from your child's reality?
- What fears arise when you see your child as a stranger?
A Different Perspective
Loving a child can be hindered by personal insecurities and societal pressures.
