English class Quote by Allison Raskin

“The joke wasn't about Voltaire. It was about Camus.”

— Gaby Dunn

“Your mother, my mother, and mother of pearl walk into a bar, and the bartender says, “Hello, dad, you look more like whiskey than…

— Jarod Kintz

“You've been through my stuff. I bent over and let one of you stick the world's longest finger up my ass. If a prostate…

— Stephen King

“One hand was on his hip, the other holding the knotted belt of his trench coat. My mouth dropped open, because what the fuck…

— Megan Erickson

“Did you tell that prospect over there that ‘not a hair’ on my head was to be touched?” “I think I said, ‘not a…

— Lauren Gilley

“I smile and begin to chuckle. “Mr. Darcy, do you find my instructions humorous?” I look up to see the doctor handing me a…

— Christina Boyd

“If you don’t pray,” he said, lowering his voice, “why do you wear it?” They were sitting at a table for two by a…

— Mohsin Hamid

“In the light of the crappy little lamp, all I was looking at was a frizzy mop of blonde hair and a bare back…

— John Barnes

“He started wrapping the fabric around my eyes and I laughed, “Caeden, what are you doing?” “I think that’s pretty obvious. I’m blindfolding you,…

— Micalea Smeltzer

“I picked it up, stared at it, and thought: Why am I the one bending and lifting while he sits downstairs complaining about his…

— Belinda Kelderhouse

“I stared at the doors and rewound the evening wondering how I got myself in this latest predicament. Without lemon drops to blame (I…

— Kristen Ashley

“If you don’t laugh reading this book I’ll eat my pocket protector. Wait, did I just admit I had a pocket protector?”

— Nicole Fende