“In his dream, George Stetchkin was in the dock at the Central Criminal Court, accused of the murder of nine million innocent brain cells. The usher was showing the jury the alleged murder weapon, an empty Bison Brand wodka bottle.… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
Telling lies is a bit like tiling bathrooms - if you don't know how to do it properly, it's best not to try. — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
“A lifetime in the business had taught her that, apart from the few good people that work along-side you,nobody is to be trusted,ever,because sooner… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
“The conscientious arsonist doesn't just set the building on fire; first he fills the fire extinguishers with petrol.” — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
“Just when you’ve squared up to the solemn realisation that life is a bitch, it turns round and does something nice, just to confuse… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
Among the gods, there is a dispute as to which one of them originally thought of Christianity; or, as they call it, the Great… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
There’s nothing bad about reincarnation per se, it’s basically a very good system, cost-effective and ecologically friendly. — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
Genies rarely have nightmares, for the same reason that elephants don't usually worry about being trampled underfoot. With the possible exception of bottles, there's… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
“Georgie paused on the threshold for a moment as if hesitant to enter the habitation of such a perjurer lest it should be struck… — Tom Holt Copy Share Image
