The only reason your girlfriend always wears short skirts...is because every pair of pants she ever wore caught on fire. — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
Success in life is my game. I collect as many coins as possible, rescue the princess, and climb the stairs to the next level. — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
I just wrote all over my penis. I can't wait to get in another argument so I can put words in your mouth. — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
It takes 17 muscles for a human to smile. So it doesn't necessarily mean you're happy when you smile, it means you're strong. — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
It is great to have options. But too many options can overwhelm you and sometimes even paralyze you to the point that you are… — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
Even though it's wetter, and it feels much better, youll feel much cleaner, with a wrapped up wiener. — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
It doesn't always pay to tell the truth, but it always costs to tell a lie. Most people will go their entire lives without… — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
I promise you the biggest mistake you can make is to crush the ones that love you with all that they have. They won't… — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
She said he's just a lump of coal. She put the weight of the world on his shoulders. Then she threw him in the… — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
The only reason your girlfriend always wears short skirts...is because every pair of pants she ever wore caught on fire. — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
Hot tubs are like relationships! They're almost too hott when you first get in, then after a while it's pure comfort... But if you… — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
In the future...you're already dead. But today, you're alive. So make the most of it and go out and do the things you want… — Zach Taylor Copy Share Image
