“I love strippers, they have an uncomplicated view of life. You give them money, they show you boobies.” — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“He still wasn't looking at me, which meant I was still in trouble. I swear, sometimes this partnership is like being married. We fight… — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“That's why God made liquor, strippers, and football, Skeeter, so straight men never have to discuss their feelings.” — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“GREG ANNOUNCES HIS RESEARCH AS TO WHAT IS GOING ON: 'Alright I have a theory " he announced rejoining us and taking a healthy… — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“HARD DAY'S KNIGHT' For a skinny little gamer-geek he'd done a good job tying me up. I guess that's another thing we can thank… — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“Dude you gota get over here Greg sounded more than a little freaked out but since Greg freaks out when he burns a Pop-Tart… — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“There’s a rule of travel in the South—if you’re going to Hell, you’re gonna change planes in Atlanta. And no matter what time you… — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image
“This isn't Dungeon & Dragons, dude. Just because I'm wearing black doesn't mean I have the Find & Remive Traps skill.” — John G. Hartness Copy Share Image