How did an allegedly free people spawn a vast, rampant cuttlefish of dominion with its tentacles in every orifice of the body… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Whatever it is that the government does, sensible Americans would prefer that the government do it to somebody else. This is the… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Politics should be limited in scope to ware, protection of property, and the occasional precautionary beheading of a member of the ruling… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Political discourse has become so rotten that it's no longer possible to tell the stench of one presidential candidate from the stink… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Government is a health hazard. Governments have killed many more people than cigarettes or unbuckled seat belts ever have. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
You'll note that politicians no longer spend money, they invest it. Don't worry about paying more to the [IRS]. You aren't being… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Politicians will talk strategy and tactics and policies and programs until they're blue in the face, or you strangle them and they… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There's a very good reason that governments aren't supposed to compete with private-enterprise companies. Governments have monopolies on certain things, like eminent… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
No government proposal more complicated than "This note is legal tender for all debts, public and private" ever works. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Agriculture is a business that has been up to its bib overalls in politics since the first Thanksgiving dinner kickback to the… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Politicians are wonderful people as longa as they stay away from things they don't understand, such as working for a living. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I understand Twitter has become popular among politicians. This technology allows them to stay in perpetual contact with their constituents. The electorate… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Politics are for foreigners with their endless wrongs and paltry rights. Politics are a lousy way to get things done. Politics are,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Whenever government proposes to get involved in the regulation of trade, just be very, very careful about who's behind this proposal, what… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In comparative terms, there's no poverty in America by a long shot. Heritage Foundation political scientist Robert Rector has worked up figures showing that… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with America, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
So-called Western Civilization, as practised in half of Europe, some of Asia and a few parts of North America, is better than anything else… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
It was Ronald Reagan who used to say that the 10 most frightening words in the English language are, "I'm from the federal government,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Gun violence has cost us too many political leaders, and hardly ever the worst ones. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Pete Seeger is a modest, unassuming, cheerful, and kind-natured man. He's a good folk singer, if you can stand folk singing. And he's such… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Something that comes to us, some gym shoe that comes to us as a result of child labor from a brutal dictatorship, where people… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Russians not only vehemently despise blacks, they believe Africa begins at the Ukraine border. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
![“You'll note that politicians no longer spend money, they invest it. Don't worry about paying more to the [IRS]. You aren't being taxed; you're taking a plunge on a fly-by-night stock issue.” quote by P. J. O'Rourke](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/817/p-j-o-rourke-184_investing_you-ll-note-that-politicians-no-longer-s_1031128.png)
