Parenting Quotes by Mark Twain

Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

— Mark Twain

My father was an amazing man. The older I got, the smarter he got.

— Mark Twain

My father was a Saint Bernard, my mother was a Collie, but I am a Presbyterian.

— Mark Twain

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.

— Mark Twain

Always obey your parents - when they are present.

— Mark Twain

Good fathers not only tell us how to live, they show us.

— Mark Twain

My parents were neither very poor nor conspicuously honest.

— Mark Twain

Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

— Mark Twain

In Boston they ask, how much does he know? In New York, how much is he worth? In Philadelphia, who were his…

— Mark Twain

“it was borne in upon me that I was standing in the awful presence of the Mother of the German Language.”

— Mark Twain

It is a wise child that knows its own father, and an unusual one that unreservedly approves of him.

— Mark Twain

It is at our mother's knee that we acquire our noblest and truest and highest ideals, but there is seldom any money…

— Mark Twain

When I was 17, my father was so stupid, I didn't want to be seen with him in public. When I was…

— Mark Twain

“India is the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend and…

— Mark Twain

It is at our mother's knee that we acquire our noblest and truest and highest ideals.

— Mark Twain

Look at the mother of Washington! She raised a boy that could not tell a lie--could not tell a lie! But he…

— Mark Twain

“A Christian mother's first duty is to soil her child's mind, and she does not neglect it. Her lad grows up to…

— Mark Twain

India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and…

— Mark Twain

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.…

— Mark Twain

When I was fourteen years old, I was amazed at how unintelligent my father was. By the time I turned twenty-one, I…

— Mark Twain

Always obey your parents. When they are present. This is the best policy in the long run. Because if you don't, they…

— Mark Twain

India is the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and…

— Mark Twain

It is the Creator´s Grand Army, and he is the Commander-in-Chief... With these facts before you, now try to guess man´s chiefest…

— Mark Twain

“One must make allowances for a parental instinct that has been starving for twenty-five or thirty years. It is famished, it is…

— Mark Twain

I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. I believe that whenever a human being,…

— Mark Twain

“I lost Susy thirteen years ago; I lost her mother--her incomparable mother!--five and a half years ago; Clara has gone away to…

— Mark Twain

Protestant parents still keep a Bible handy in the house, so that the children can study it, and one of the first…

— Mark Twain

My father and I were always on the most distant terms when I was a boy--a sort of armed neutrality, so to…

— Mark Twain

When I was fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have him around. When I got to be…

— Mark Twain

“O Lord our Father, our young patriots, idols of our hearts, go forth to battle -- be Thou near them! With them…

— Mark Twain

My mother had a slender, small body, but a large heart-a heart so large that everybody's joys found welcome in it, and…

— Mark Twain

“In discarding the monkey and substituting man, our Father in Heaven did the monkey an undeserved injustice.”

— Mark Twain

I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey

— Mark Twain

What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.

— Mark Twain

By his father he is English, by his mother he is Americanto my mind the blend which makes the perfect man.

— Mark Twain

As one boy said, 'I was thinking all these horrible thoughts about my parents when suddenly it hit me-if they're all that…

— Mark Twain

I used to think my father was an idiot, until I turned twenty-one... Then I thought he was a genus.

— Mark Twain

If your mother tells you to do a thing, it is wrong to reply that you won't. It is better and more…

— Mark Twain

More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father; He is always longing for the love of…

— Mark Twain

The average American may not know who his grandfather was. But the American was, however, one degree better off than the average…

— Mark Twain