“The leadoff batter for the Minnesota Twins hit a foul ball into the stands and struck his mother. He will spend the rest of the season in his room.” — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“I’d like to see things from your point of view, but I can’t seem to get my head that far up my ass. ◆” — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“◆ Do you want people to accept you as you are ... or do you want them to like you?” — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“Tiger Woods dropped out of the TPC because of a “bulge” in his neck. Wasn’t a bulge what got him in trouble in the… — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“The leadoff batter for the Minnesota Twins hit a foul ball into the stands and struck his mother. He will spend the rest of… — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“Don’t piss me off today, I’m running out of places to hide bodies.” — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“I’d like to give you a going-away present . . . but you have to do your part.” — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“A woman is driving along when the car in front of her hits the brakes suddenly, and she plows into it. An extremely short… — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
“To a political consultant: “Here, I’ll talk to your butt ... I’m sorry, I forgot which side the poop comes out of.” — Lawrence Dorfman Copy Share Image
