For most women, the language of conversation is primarily a language of rapport: a way of establishing connections and negotiating relationships. — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
The chivalrous man who holds a door open or signals a woman to go ahead of him when he's driving is negotiating both status and connection. — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
In dialogue, there is opposition, yes, but no head-on collision. Smashing heads does not open minds. — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
Cooperation isn't the absence of conflict but a means of managing conflict. — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
Communication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
“A woman will be inclined to repeat a request that doesn't get a response because she is convinced that her husband would do what… — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
Like most men, my father is interested in action. And this is why he disappoints my mother when she tells him she doesn't feel… — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
“...You're so real. That's why we love you." ... Her friend's response reflected the reciprocity of showing vulnerability. It is a gift not only… — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
The desire for freedom and independence becomes more of an issue for many men in relationships, whereas interdependence and connection become more of an… — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
To say anything about women and men without marking oneself as either feminist or anti-feminist, male-basher or apologist for men seems as impossible for… — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
Communication is a continualbalancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacyand independence. To survivein the world, we have to act in concert with others,… — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
Treating people the same is not equal treatment if they are not the same. — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
“One reason it's so difficult to decide what to say became immediately clear: comments and questions that some appreciated were not appreciated by others.” — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
All conversation, in addition to whatever else it does, displays, and asks for recognition of, our competence. — Deborah Tannen Copy Share Image
