WIFE, A person who only lasts as long as a marriage -- an ex-wife is forever — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, A delightful form of combat where you get to sleep with the enemy; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
You know you've drank too much when you actually ask your wife to drive you home. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
They named it Twitter because Licking each other dirty asses was too long. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
If God Was A Woman… A man's paycheck would be made payable to his wife — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Since the snow came all the wife has done is look through the window. If it gets any worse, I'll have to… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The first thing I do when I receive wedding invitations in the mail is read them for typos. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
The best thing that can happen to a couple married for fifty years or more is that they both grow nearsighted together. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
They say that when a man holds a woman's hand before marriage, it is love….after marriage it is self-defense. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
WIFE, A great comfort during her husband's troubles -- those, that as a bachelor, he would never have had; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE CEREMONY, a rite which a clergyman should perform at no charge -- don't they say that you shouldn't profit by other… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Not sure if you should cheat on your wife with the hot chick from work? Let your dick make the decision for… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, The process of finding out the kind of guy your wife would have preferred; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, The continuous process of getting used to things you never expected; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
LOVE, Something they say is blind -- it's marriage which is the real eye opener; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Watched a movie with my wife last night, I was on the edge of my seat. Fat bitch. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, That ceremony which makes more strange bedfellows than politics; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I can't believe it's already ummm yeah whatever month of the whatever year this is! — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
SEX DRIVE, a physical craving which appears at puberty and ends at marriage — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, A legal custom which turns a man into the captive audience of his wife; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
On one thing, at least, men & women both agree: They both distrust women. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
My wife just asked me to do something she saw in a porn movie: order a pizza. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, The process that turns a female from an attraction into a distraction; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE, An event, for the upper middle class, is the only adventure left; — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Sometimes I look at my awesome twitter followers & think to myself, What the hell would I do without them :) — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I won't be tweeting this sunday. I have better things to do like bashing myself by following girls on streets. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Men and women shop differently. Men know what they want before they see it. Women don't know what they want until they see it. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
I used to receive virtual smiles, sweet morning and night greetings. Now all I have is silence, and a blistered heart. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
Do girls really look at penises and say Wow, I can't wait to put that in my mouth? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share
