A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
[I like to] engage with funny people, or weird people, or, you know, kind of off people. [Whereas when I meet] anybody… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I have no interest in gender or race or anything like that. But everyone else is kind of, with their calculating -… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
A movie is kind of like being the captain of a ship, which is nice, but when I perform by myself it's… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
A lot of advertising has gotten worse. I think it's kind of lost its nerve, to be honest with you. I feel… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
We sold 'Seinfeld' all over the world but it was a very specific kind of show. In some countries it went down… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
The truth is, I had always wanted to be a comedian, but I really didn't have that kind of personality, and it's… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
When you're in comedy, people always come up and say, 'Oh, it must be so hard.' It really isn't hard unless you're… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
People should get married because they have finally seen the folly of being single: "Oh, this is all just kind of a… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
They seal the subway change-booth guy up inside this thing with bullet-proof glass, closed in on all sides, it's like some kind… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
One day I was watching these construction workers go back to work. I was watching them kind of trudging down the street.… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I kind of thought that stand-up comedy would suffer from the Internet because people seem to know more about the craft of… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
I had a parakeet that used to fly around the house and crash into these huge mirrors my mother put in. Ever… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
With any kind of physical test, I don't know what it is, I always seem to get competitive. Remember when you were… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share Image
We’re all trying to get to the same island, whether you swim, fly, surf, or skydive in, it doesn’t matter. What matters is when… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
I have a nice bookshelf in my office, but not my house. I'm crass, but not that crass. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
There's no downside to fame and people who whine about it make me sick. It's the greatest thing in the world. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
We're all trying to get to the same island — whether you swim, fly, surf, or skydive, it doesn't matter. What matters is when… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
I was in the drug store the other day trying to get a cold medication...Not easy. There's an entire wall of products you need.… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
I went up to the camp and Paul had me eat my first oyster I had never had an oyster in my life. And… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
Then, finally, the third year, begging the parents, I got the Superman Halloween costume. Cardboard box, self-made top, mask included. Remember the rubber band… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
This is really a crazy idea, you know. It probably won't work, but that will be interesting, too. You have to motivate yourself with… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
If you get something right, you really feel it, right in your chest, on stage. I think it's an incomparable experience. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
It's hard to do nothing because you tend to do something and then you have to drop everything. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
A really hard laugh is like sex-one of the ultimate diversions of existence. — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
There are many things you can point to as proof that the human is not smart. But my personal favorite would have to be… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
You know what I never get with the limo? The tinted windows. Is that so people don't see you? Yeah, what a better way… — Jerry Seinfeld Copy Share
![“[I like to] engage with funny people, or weird people, or, you know, kind of off people. [Whereas when I meet] anybody who's ... normal ... I'm not curious, I'm not interested.” quote by Jerry Seinfeld](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/e9d/jerry-seinfeld-880_curious_i-like-to-engage-with-funny-people-or-we_486070.jpg)
