“Out of all the medical advancements in human history I'm still most in awe of that tiny little piece of toilet paper that can stop a gushing razor cut in its tracks.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“The only time in history Keanu Reeves' acting would have been considered appropriate is if he were the first human being on earth. But then you have to consider that the flowers would wilt.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
I can say with unwavering certitude that I have never started a pint of Ben 'n Jerry's ice cream that I didn't finish in… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“When Rip Torn dies - heaven forbid - but when he dies, you'll only have to write RIP Torn.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“You're pretty great, God, and I mean that, but if it were up to me - like if I happened to be YOU -… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“The start of a run is like the start of a writing session: First you resist, then you threaten to quit, then you roll… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“A pure heart faces the worst kind of evil in this world. But as it sleeps it's blessed, and it wakes up cleansed and… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“If in answer to your inner voice screaming 'don't do it', you shake your head and do it anyway, I can guarantee your days… — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Did the guy who invent the shower cap also invent the fitted bed sheet?” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“All great art is almost never received well initially; don't quit before the world opens its eyes.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Live your life somewhere in between Ayn Rand and Mother Theresa. It's just as important to better yourself as it is to better others.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“Sade pretty much summed up life in seven words: 'It's only love that gets you through.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
“People who put avocados in the fridge are basically saying, 'I want to eventually experience something less amazing.” — Gregor Collins Copy Share Image
