Funny Quotes by Hussein Nishah · Page 3

Im the person that the more you complain about me, the harder Ill try to annoy you

— Hussein Nishah

I dont understand how Super Mario can smash blocks with his head but dies when he touches a turtle

— Hussein Nishah

Bitch also stands for beautiful, intelligent, talented and charming human being

— Hussein Nishah

Dear Samsung, please also start selling jeans that can accommodate your smartphones.

— Hussein Nishah

How does a doctor feel when he loses a patient in the emergency room? The same way a child feels when he…

— Hussein Nishah

My wifi suddenly stop working then I realized that my neighbors have not paid the bill. How irresponsible people are

— Hussein Nishah

Working in a team means spending half your time convincing the others that your idea is better than theirs.

— Hussein Nishah

Finding a treasure is like working on algebra equations, all you have to do is find the X

— Hussein Nishah

At the zoo, all the animals have a decent composure, except for the monkeys. You get the feeling man is very close…

— Hussein Nishah

You cant put a price tag on love. But if you could, Id wait for it to go on sale.

— Hussein Nishah

If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date, you know you have small boobs.

— Hussein Nishah

I watched a black and white TV for so long, so when I got a color TV I picked the red one

— Hussein Nishah

I always thought by 2013 we would have flying cars. Instead, we have blankets with sleeves.

— Hussein Nishah

Laughter is the best medicine, but if you laugh for no reason than you need medicine

— Hussein Nishah

By the time I realized my parents were right, I had kids that didn't believe me.

— Hussein Nishah

What is the best thing to do when you have a hole in a boat and water is leaking inside? Make another…

— Hussein Nishah

Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, don't sell drugs. The government hates competition.

— Hussein Nishah

The problem with marriage is that it was invented when people lived to the ripe old age of 30.

— Hussein Nishah

Love is what you make it. Unfortunately, I cant make it today, as I have a doctors appointment

— Hussein Nishah

When I saw the monkeys at the zoo it reminded me of watching political debates on TV

— Hussein Nishah

Newtons law of love: Love can neither be created nor be destroyed. Only it can transfer from one girlfriend to another with…

— Hussein Nishah

If loving someone is putting them in a straitjacket and kicking them down a flight of stairs, then yes, I have loved…

— Hussein Nishah

Single dudes, if you're in the bar/clubs and you're reading this you're are not getting laid tonight.

— Hussein Nishah

I just poured superglue into a non-stick pan.Somebody is going to be wrong.

— Hussein Nishah

Study finds that if someone likes your stuff on Facebook/Instagram you're 56% more likely to do a favor for them.

— Hussein Nishah

I tried taking everything in Life with a grain of salt, but after using up two bags of salt, I gave up.

— Hussein Nishah

How hasn't someone invented a smoke detector that can tell the difference between blazing inferno & toast?!?

— Hussein Nishah

Researchers claim that the Internet is making us dumber and more impatient. I dont get it. Moving on.

— Hussein Nishah

I always open the medicine cabinet quietly. The sleeping pills don't like to be woken.

— Hussein Nishah

That awesome moment when your best friend likes your Facebook status because they know the story behind it.

— Hussein Nishah

Strangers think Im quiet, my friends think Im outgoing, my best friends know Im insane.

— Hussein Nishah

The first person who decided to say a word instead of throwing a rock can be considered the starter of civilization

— Hussein Nishah

Dear Mario, I wasted my childhood trying to save your girlfriend. You owe me.

— Hussein Nishah

After a lot of research, scientists have concluded that the most vitamins are found in the pharmacy

— Hussein Nishah

My wife asked me what numbers to play at the lottery. I told her 'the winning ones

— Hussein Nishah

Why do you always see lightning first and hear the thunder later? Because your eyes are in front of your ears

— Hussein Nishah

The awkward moment when youre waiting for a text but then you realize youre the one who didnt reply.

— Hussein Nishah

I follow the quote, Always be true to yourself because I only lie to others

— Hussein Nishah

Why do single women take advice from other single women? That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions.

— Hussein Nishah

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and the hours are lost

— Hussein Nishah