Funny soccer Quotes

That goal surprised most people, least of all myself

— Garth Crooks

The dice are stacked against them

— Theo Foley

I don't hold water with that theory

— Ron Greenwood

We are really the victims of our own problems

— Jimmy Greaves

Well, he had two stabs at the cherry

— Alan Green

Our fans have been branded with the same brush

— Ron Atkinson

The opening ceremony was good, although I missed it.

— Graeme Le Saux

Whelan was in the position he was, exactly

— Jimmy Armfield

The Brazilians were South American, and the Ukranians will be more European.

— Phil Neville

I think everyone in the stadium went home happy, except all those people in Rumania

— Ron Greenwood

Leeds is a great club and it's been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesborough.

— Jonathan Woodgate

Wembley way is beginning to blacked with people in terms of red and blue

— Alan Jackson

This is a tremendous assest for the club, a tremendous headache lifted from our shoulders, really.

— Elton John

We have been saying this, both pre season and before the season started

— Len Ashurst

The goals made such a difference to the way this game went

— John Motson

The rules of soccer are very simple: if it moves, kick it. If it doesn't move, kick it until it does,

— Anonymous

John Bond has brought in a young left-sided midfield player, who I guess will play on the left side of midfield.

— Jimmy Armfield

Some people tell me that we professional players are soccer slaves. Well, if this is slavery, give me a life sentence.

— Bobby Charlton

The last player to score a hatrick in a cup final was Stan Mortenson. He even had a final named after him,…

— Lawrie McMenemy

Ardilies always says "If you're confident you're always totally different to the player that's lacking confidence"

— Keith Burkinshaw

I'm sure sex wouldn't be so rewarding as this World Cup. It's not that sex isn't good but the World Cup is…

— Ronaldo

I don't know if that result's enough to life Birmingham off the bottom of the table, although it'll certainly take them above…

— Mike Ingham

It's an incredible rise to stardom. At 17 you're more likely to get a call from Michael Jackson than England manager Sven…

— Gordon Strachan

In Scotland football hooliganism has been met by banning alcohol from grounds but in England this solution has been circumnavigated

— Wallace Mercer

I was watching the Blackburn game on TV on Sunday when it flashed on the screen that George (Ndah) had scored in…

— Ade Akinbiyi

The Germans only have one player under 22, and he's 23!

— Kevin Keegan

Kicked wide of the goal with such precision

— Des Lynam

Well Ibrox is filling up slowly, but rapidly

— James Sanderson

Portsmouth are at Huddersfield, which is always away

— Jimmy Greaves

The run of the ball is not in our court at the moment

— Phil Neal

At least is was a victory and at least we won

— Bobby Moore

A win tonight is the minimum City must achieve

— Alan Parry

I'm as happy as I can be-but I have been happier.

— Ugo Ehiogu

To me personally, it's nothing personal to me

— Ron Greenwood

The margin is very marginal.

— Bobby Robson

Playing in Italy was like being in a foreign country.

— Ian Rush

Well we got nine and you can't score more than that

— Bobby Robson

Believe it or not, goals can change a game.

— Mick Channon

He hit that one like an arrow

— Alan Parry

Peter Weir has just shrugged off an ankle injury

— Jock Brown