Being at home with loved ones all week has shown me how much I miss my miserable job. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you realize you've kept talking even after your call dropped out... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Real girls stay. Hoes come and go. Little boys play around. Real men settle down. — Dyllan Copy Share Image
When money grows on trees, you can bet there's a lot of grafting going on. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I wish I could trade my heart in for another liver. Then I could drink more and care less. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear phone, I drop you. I say I hate you. I throw you. I lose you. I forget about you, but I… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
After 70, a woman is like Tibet: Beautiful, with a mysterious past andthe wisdom of the ages. An adventurous spirit and a… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Twitter makes me like people I've never met and because of Facebook I hate people I know in real life. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Yes I'm pissed off and most people irritate me.But if people weren't so ignorant, self absorbed and down right stupid,i wouldn't have… — Simi Ngr Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you wake up in the middle of the night and that hallway is suddenly the most terrifying thing… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Go out all day looking good and I see no one I know. Go out for 5 minutes looking like shit and… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The awkward moment when you post the funniest facebook status you have ever written but no one likes ! xP — Komal Copy Share Image
Sometimes I wish youd pay more attention to my favorite songs because the lyrics they sing are the words Im too scared… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Facebook the biggest DRAMA social network people use today, never miss anything — Taelor Chardae Copy Share Image
When a waitress tells me the plate is hot I can't help but touch it anyway. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Don't like your own facebook status. is like giving a high five to your self in public — Michael Add-Star Copy Share Image
You are my song playing so softly in my heart, I reach for you, you seem so near yet so far. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People that always write statuses and comment their happy their single, aren't. — Livefree2dream44 Copy Share Image
Way to make a girl smile: always tell her You're beautiful. a little lie doesn't matter (: — OhItsVynn Copy Share Image
Ladies, when a guy whistles at you, ignore him. You're a lady, not a dog. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Why is it called beauty sleep, when you wake up in the morning and look like crap. — Brii Ann Copy Share Image
You live, you laugh, you love, you learn. You scream, you cry, you crash, you burn. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Trying to find the best quotes on Google to put on your facebook status, just to get attention! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Facebook, Pretty Soon, They'll All Abandon You, Too. Sincerely, MySpace — Toni Watson Copy Share Image
In Kindergarten we called them cooties...in High School we call them STD's. — Tanya Bianco Copy Share Image
To young for marriage, to old for games, to smart for players and to fly for lames. — Amanda Copy Share Image
Sometimes, we stop talking to a person, because we no longer know what to say anymore... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The most awkward place to run into a homeless person is on your way to a Coinstar. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
