Smoking weed is legal in 6 states. Having sex with a horse is legal in 23. Good going America. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's always awesome when my blinker matches the beat of the song on the radio. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when you tickle someone and they're not even ticklish. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If you expect the world to be fair with you because you're fair to them, its like asking a lion not to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hate when Im watching a show on DVR and I realize Im mostly through a commercial break and I forgot to… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Just because I like your Facebook status does not mean I want to sleep, date, or hangout with you... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hate when exes say, I'm here if you need me. Bitch, Where the fuck were you when we were together? Fuck… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Even if you aren't hungry, the worst thing you can be told after a dentist appointment is: 'You can't eat for 30… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Facebook peeps: Please stop showing photos of animal cruelty and dead pets. If I want to be depressed I'll just youtube… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I don't want to hear you complain about the heat unless you are planning to take off all your clothes. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I really don't know what to do when people poke me on Facebook...I get so confuse therefore, I just poke them back. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My excuse for being lazy: I'm not the real slim shady, so why would I stand up? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That frustrating moment when you don't finish your text before the damn light turns green... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Fall, Thank you for giving me a reason to wear cute boots and drink pumpkin spice lattes! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Facebook should change the relationship status from 'Its complicated' to 'Sammie and Ronnie' — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Best of luck not getting murdered by the roommate you found on Craigslist. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Fellas: If you want your girl to remain an Angel...create a heaven for her. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I'm the kind of person who would come out of the gym...And go straight to McDonalds. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Someone is always gonna talk about you.. so you might as well give them something to talk about — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awesome moment when you drop your iPod and but your headphone cords save its life. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hate finding out that theres no milk in the fridge AFTER Ive already poured my cereal. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I dont care if People dont like me. After all I'm not a Facebook Status. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Stop advertising your relationship on social networks; not everyone want to see you happy. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Me being mean: Can you shut the fuck up? Me being nice: Can you please shut the fuck up? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That horrifying moment when you put a ring on your finger and you cant take it off! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The amazing moment when you type your homework on google and found exactly what you need. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share
Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer… — Anonymous Copy Share
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share
The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,… — Anonymous Copy Share
