Thank you for calling customer service. If you're calm and rational, press 1. If you're a whiner, press 2. If you're a hot head, press 3 — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
“Of course I can accept you for who you are. You are someone I need to change.” — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
I learned about stress management from my kids. Every night after work, I drink some chocolate milk, eat sugary cereal straight from the box,… — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
What fits your busy schedule better, exercising one hour a day or being dead 24 hours a day? — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
Thank you for calling customer service. If you're calm and rational, press 1. If you're a whiner, press 2. If you're a hot head, press 3 — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
Thank you for calling the Weight Loss Hotline. If you'd like to lose a half pound right now, press 1 eighteen thousand times. — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
He gave me a copy of The Declaration of Independence, then he got a tattoo that says Give Me Liberty Or Give Me Death.… — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
I think men were destined to become homemakers. After all, who ever heard of "Ms. Clean" or the "Woman from Glad"? — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
These motivational tapes have really inspired me! I'm going to make a million dollars, buy my own company and retire early. Then, I'm going… — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
Whenever I call a company and get put on hold, I never really feel like I'm being held. — Randy Glasbergen Copy Share Image
