If you are a New York comedian who knows how to improvise and has glasses, you're going to start getting commercials. — Chris Gethard Copy Share Image
A comedian can only last till he either takes himself serious or his audience takes him serious. — Will Rogers Copy Share Image
If you don't laugh, you're going to cry and people are crying. That's why I guess you have lots of people like… — Tracy Morgan Copy Share Image
I have comedic things in my stuff, but I don't consider myself a comedian. I'm just a YouTuber, I guess just a… — Ryan Higa Copy Share Image
My job as a comedian is to heighten awareness about locally grown produce, fight factory farming, and promote euthanasia, but in a… — Dov Davidoff Copy Share Image
I think the fundamental issue with comedians is everyone wants to be a famous comedian. That's a really difficult thing to achieve… — Andrew Santino Copy Share Image
It's always impressive when talented comedians are easy laughers or generous with their laughs. — Hank Azaria Copy Share Image
Dick Gregory was a great comedian who went and got arrested, did hunger strikes, protests. It never hurt his career to be… — Joe Rogan Copy Share Image
I've been trying to find women writers for my staff for a while now and I have three women on my staff… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
Being comedian outside of performing, you're someone who's analyzing life, and thinking about it, and observing so much. In my opinion, it… — Chris Gethard Copy Share Image
It is hard to get mad at Donald Trump for saying stupid things, in the same way you don't get mad at… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
In elementary school, in case of fire you have to line up quietly in a single file line from smallest to tallest.… — Warren Hutcherson Copy Share Image
Sort of' is such a harmless thing to say... sort of. It's just a filler. Sort of... it doesn't really mean anything.… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
So I kept it to myself. Then some of my classmates started to come down to the comedy club, taking a girl… — Chris Tucker Copy Share Image
Once people enjoy what I do, I don't mind if they call me a magician or an illusionist or a hypnotist, entertainer,… — Keith Barry Copy Share Image
As a comedian, you have to start the show strong and you have to end the show strong. Those are the two… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close… — Dane Cook Copy Share Image
Las Vegas has become a child's picture-book dream of a city -- here a storybook castle, there a sphinx-flanked black pyramid beaming… — Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
I would like a ship for the hips, please. Ships and hips. Hipsters to stir with their hips on the hip ships.… — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but… — Aisha Tyler Copy Share Image
Obviously, you take the risk to step over the line any time you do something where comedians interact with each other. Like… — Doug Benson Copy Share Image
I know it's the comedian's instinct to say, "Do it, man, nothing's off-limits! It's cool, bro!" I don't know if that's the… — Bo Burnham Copy Share Image
Only black people in the whole neighborhood, so let's break it down: Me, I'm a decent comedian, I'm a'ight. Mary J. Blige,… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Philosophers, comedians, and tipsy birthday celebrants all have proposed theories about why time seems to move increasingly swiftly as we grow older.… — Michael Sims Copy Share Image
If you go down as a comedian's comedian, that's basically meaning other comedians are hopefully feeling that you're doing okay. — Eddie Izzard Copy Share Image
Comedians get jokes offered to them, rock stars get women and underwear thrown onstage, and I get guys that want to take… — Les Claypool Copy Share Image
“God is a comedian playing to an audience that is afraid to laugh. VOLTAIRE” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When I was ten, I wrote an essay on what I would be when I grew up and said I would be… — Will Ferrell Copy Share Image
I'm very lucky to be a comedian, and I feel privileged that people come to see me in the expectation that I… — Jon Richardson Copy Share Image
I don't do too many jokes about current affairs, because almost every comedian always does that. — Bruce Bruce Copy Share Image
Once you become a comedian, you accept that people are just going to yell stuff at you. — Aziz Ansari Copy Share Image
I weighed 107 kilos when 'Sukh' was released. I had become like a South Indian comedian. — Govinda Copy Share Image
One night I attended a Laughing Liberally comedy show. There was one funny comedian there - Lee Camp. — Matt Labash Copy Share Image
“She seemed to feed on their laughter, and they on her humor, like the lily of the pond—sustained by the very water… — Molly Collier Copy Share Image
If Jay spent as much time studying as he does trying to be a comedian, he'd be a big star. — Jay Leno Copy Share Image
I was a big fan of Rodney Dangerfield. He had this HBO Young Comedians Special and he'd always bring up new talent,… — Gabriel Iglesias Copy Share Image
I'm always trying to find the next comedian that just gives me something a little funny to combine with all of the… — Jesse Williams Copy Share Image
I just respected comedians whether they were or they weren't, from, you know, new or old. — Steve Martin Copy Share Image
I have always been a comedian - that has always been my job and it is what I want to do for… — Iain Stirling Copy Share Image
What made me a comedian was that I wasn't really a songwriter, I was more of a poet. — Tommy Chong Copy Share Image
