Comedian Quotes · Page 16

You can't fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.

— George Carlin

I'm a very straightforward person. But that's fine for a comedian. Because a lot of times you're talking about everyone else.

— John Mulaney

Sometimes you watch comedians and feel like they're jerking off in front of you, but they want you to see how big…

— Jenny Slate

When they put me in jail, that's when they turned me into an activist. Up until the time I went to jail,…

— Tommy Chong

A comedian's body is funny as well as his mind being funny, his whole personage is funny.

— Bobby Darin

I think humor is important for all of us, and a great comedian is a great treasure.

— Leila Josefowicz

Comedians are a much rarer and far more valuable commodity than all the gold and precious stones in the world.

— Groucho Marx

Marshall you're so funny man you should be a comedian god damn unfortunately I am I just hide behind the tears of…

— Eminem

I love music. I've always wanted to do music, even when I started out as a comedian.

— Jamie Foxx

I think it's great training for any comedian to start on cows. Because with cows, you expect them to be bored and…

— Kristen Schaal

I have late onset ADHD. I take on too much and end up spinning plates, but it's entertaining, and it helps you…

— Rory Bremner

I'm a comedian, and I have my share of anxiety and depression; so do most of my friends. My humor tends to…

— Rachel Bloom

I spent more time in America, but I developed a very English sense of humour. I clicked into it deeply with Peter…

— Christopher Guest

When you're a cricket fan, your summer is defined by the Test match itinerary. Similarly, when you're a young comedian, your summer…

— Tim Key

You can't tell how experienced a comedian is by how light they travel. An established comic who I love, Lucy Pearman, wheeled…

— Lou Sanders

The average comedian is kind of an observer looking at everyday things that everyone could relate to and then trying to find…

— Aries Spears

You spend so much time in the world of virtual that the actual - which nothing is more actual than stand-up -…

— Jerry Seinfeld

I suppose in our culture - in our lifetime - we've always enjoyed people who tell it straight. We like our presidents,…

— Oliver Stone

Somebody who opposes Trump is wound so tight, they're not funny people anyway, that they don't get his humor. They really believe…

— Rush Limbaugh

I never really saw myself as a comedian, and it's been unbelievable to see that people think of me in that way…

— Anna Faris

A comedian is simply a different kind of therapist. A comedian is a psychologist and a psychiatrist rolled into one. Except I…

— Eugene Mirman

Comedians work great as actors because they're good under pressure. With a lot of actors, you have to make them feel like…

— Louis C. K

I think it go serious in college when I found out I really enjoyed making people laugh. It makes me happy. I…

— Bill Bellamy

I used to want to be a war photographer, and I used to want to be a ballerina and a comedian. I…

— Cat Power

Jay Wexler is my kind of writer--a weird one, and a wry one, and one who isnt afraid to act silly in…

— Ron Currie Jr

Comedians sometimes forget that there's an audience. You gotta be conscious that you're performing for other human beings.

— Jeff Garlin

Alan King, a comedian I adored, was considered society, and I was considered the Jewish kid from the neighborhood.

— Don Rickles

I'm a big fan of comedians not having to apologize for anything. Nowadays it seems comedians are always apologizing for being funny.

— Kevin Dillon

There are few lonelier sights than a good comedian being funny in a movie that doesn't know what funny is.

— Roger Ebert

I would say, up until 'Anchorman,' I wasn't any kind of household name or anything, but I wasn't necessarily identified as much…

— Paul Rudd

Harold Lloyd was not a comedian. But he was the finest actor to play a comedian that I ever saw.

— Hal Roach

With comedians, you have that understanding that we're trying to get laughs.

— Colin Quinn

I do feel good doing them [family-friendly movies], but it's not going to be my way of life. I'm a comedian.

— Adam Sandler

A comedian's career span is five or 10 years. I am lucky to have worked with so many distinguished actors and their grandsons.

— Ali

I think the hard thing for young comedians is that the majority of the young people in the audience out there don't…

— John Cleese

I considered myself a professional comedian because the club would pay me $20.

— Tom Green

Comedians are really writers who don't have pens and pencils about them, but they riff.

— Carl Reiner

I'm not a professional comedian. Nobody comes to my comedy shows. That's just a little hobby.

— David Rees

Pakistan hasn't been cast in the role of... interesting cultural place or, you know, land of great comedians.

— Mohsin Hamid

“The way you turn a sad story around, you should be a comedian! You’re the funniest person I know.”

— Patricia Williams