“But there was air conditioning. Sweet, precious, thank-you-baby-Jesus air conditioning.” — Amanda Heger Copy Share Image
“Aaargh...that'll teach me to eat pig in the promised land. Sorry Baby Jesus.” — Guy Delisle Copy Share Image
My first role was in a Nativity play. My mom was playing Mary, and I was crying backstage, so she brought me… — Morena Baccarin Copy Share Image
May baby Jesus bring you and your family lots of love. May the host of angels fill your life with joy and… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The best gift that you can give baby Jesus this birthday is a caring heart! Merry Christmas to you and your loved… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Mary, Joseph, and baby Jesus. My lips hurt from pressing them together to muffle the scream. Sorry, baby Jesus. I shouldn’t be… — Alice Ward Copy Share Image
“By the way, don’t you think shoving a light bulb up baby Jesus’ butt and plugging it in is just a little… — Dana Marie Bell Copy Share Image
“In the stillness of morning, in the ordinary tasks of the day, in the smile of a precious baby— Jesus comes to… — Allene vanOirschot Copy Share Image
“Baby Jesus, meek and mild, pray for me, an orphan child. Be my strength, be my friend, be with me until the… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
Merry Christmas to someone who'd care more about Baby Jesus if he was in Kate Middleton's uterus. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Looking out of the window at the infinite sky, I prayed out, 'Dear Baby Jesus, I am sorry for my sin, even… — Louise Rennison Copy Share Image
As we rejoice and celebrate this wonderful season of Christmas, let us not forget to thank baby Jesus for coming into our… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“The Dolly's around here can't be seen to coddle a snitch's family --- that's the always been our way. We're old blood,… — Daniel Woodrell Copy Share Image
Most artists I know had one person in their life who told them they were the second coming of the baby Jesus,… — Bruce Springsteen Copy Share Image
This Christmas Eve let us celebrate baby Jesus has come once more to this world to teach as that love for our… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My name was originally Da Baby Jesus, but I changed it like two years into my career because I didn't want to… — DaBaby Copy Share Image
Christmas has been a season of mixed interests and meanings, but the very foundation, of course, is its religious significance. No matter… — Jimmy Carter Copy Share Image
Jesus is the main reason for this wonderful occasion. This Christmas let us together venerate baby Jesus and promise him to try… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Let us remember that the Christmas heart is a giving heart, a wide open heart that thinks of others first. The birth… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“In one corner of the square is a manger scene with two live sheep, a bed of hay, a couple of cows.… — Laura Kelly Copy Share Image
“What started Baby Jesus growing in Mary's tummy was an angel zoomed down, like a ghost but a really cool one with… — Emma Donoghue Copy Share Image
Sweet baby Jesus, Blue Eyes was… He was gorgeous in all the ways that made girls do stupid things. He was tall,… — J. Lynn Copy Share Image
I love my family but my family - they're the type of people that never let you forget anything you ever did...… — Wanda Sykes Copy Share Image
Question the Chestnuts. Chestnuts: the new name for boobs? No. NO. Why would you even say that? Get your mind out of… — Chuck Wendig Copy Share Image
“We were watching this procession. It was fucking terrible and the crucifix was about 20 feet high coming around the corner. And… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
“Which brings me to the point of this call." Thank God, baby Jesus, and the Holy Ghost.” — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
Sometimes I prayed for Baby Jesus to make me good, but Baby Jesus didn't. — Barbara Kingsolver Copy Share Image
If you take off your pants and her first reaction is, "Awwww, look at it...like a little baby Jesus." Time to buy… — Dave Attell Copy Share Image
May this Christmas you be blessed and healed by the purity and innocence of Baby Jesus. May all your sins be forgiven.… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People say that the modern Christmas focuses too much on food instead of, like in olden times, the little Baby Jesus. Piffle. — Grace Dent Copy Share Image
“Whoa, the baby Jesus lives in Chamberlain?” “In an igloo next to the inn. Try again.” “Um,” — Chris d'Lacey Copy Share Image
