There is no 20-year period in American history when stocks lost money. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I blame feminism and Facebook for the death of the American automobile. I'm a Republican, so I blame everything on feminism -… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
If there are three words that need to be used more in American journalism, commentary, politics, personal life... it's the magic words… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There are two factors in American politics that may seem strange to Europeans: race and religion. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The number of American presidential candidates varies with the sunspot cycle and the phases of the moon. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I'm old enough to remember when the air over American cities was a lot dirtier than it is now. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
America is not doctrinaire. It's hard for an American politician to come up with an ideological position that is permanently unforgivable. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
No Americans wants to see somebody lose their house because of health bills. Their boat? Maybe. Maybe the boat. But not the… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
I think that humor has become a principle means of communication among Americans about politics. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
If I were a congressman who had voted for the American Jobs Creation Act of 2004, I'd claim it was forced on… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The difference between American parties is actually simple. Democrats are in favor of higher taxes to pay for greater spending, while Republicans… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Americans are good at pursuing happiness. And the Americans who pursue happiness most diligently show that we're also good at running it… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
By the end of the 1950s, American cars were so reliable that their reliability went without saying even in car ads. Thousands… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The inherent purpose of American government is let people seek their own goals and to encourage them to be responsible on the… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
A friend of mine at the American Enterprise Institute says there are two parties: the silly party and the stupid party. I'm… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Cars let us out of the barn and, while they were at it, destroyed the American nuclear family. As anyone who has… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The car provided Americans with an enviable standard of living. You could not get a steady job with high wages and health… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Chinese economic development has cost many American workers their jobs. That's the price of progress. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
My generation of Americans was the first to really care about racism and sexism, not to mention the I Ching, plus, of… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Of all the American educational system's problems, none is more severe than the academic year beginning before Labor Day. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
We Americans, who invented traffic, are always being startled by the forms into which it has evolved around the world. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
The perpetuation of slavery, the exile and extermination of American Indians, and the passage of Jim Crow laws weren't carried out at… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There are a number of Americans who shouldn't vote. The number is 57 percent, to judge by the combined total of Clinton… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
There is only one thing that gives me hope as a Republican, and that is the Democrats. It's going to be hard… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
Public schools helped create the idea of America and inculcate Americans with a few rudiments of knowledge. To judge by that very… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share Image
In comparative terms, there's no poverty in America by a long shot. Heritage Foundation political scientist Robert Rector has worked up figures showing that… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
The Democrats said, "We don't know what's wrong with America, but we can fix it." The Republicans said, "There's nothing wrong with America, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
So-called Western Civilization, as practised in half of Europe, some of Asia and a few parts of North America, is better than anything else… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
It was Ronald Reagan who used to say that the 10 most frightening words in the English language are, "I'm from the federal government,… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Gun violence has cost us too many political leaders, and hardly ever the worst ones. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Pete Seeger is a modest, unassuming, cheerful, and kind-natured man. He's a good folk singer, if you can stand folk singing. And he's such… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Journalists are notoriously easy to kid. All you have to do is speak to a journalist in a very serious tone of voice, and… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
I'll be 56 this year, I've got two kids, and I think it's probably time to go back to writing one-glove jokes. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Something that comes to us, some gym shoe that comes to us as a result of child labor from a brutal dictatorship, where people… — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
Russians not only vehemently despise blacks, they believe Africa begins at the Ukraine border. — P. J. O'Rourke Copy Share
