They're like ''You're an alcoholic.'' I go ''No, I'm not.'' and then-apparently that's what alcoholics say too, you know? — Norm MacDonald Copy Share Image
Have you ever been to an AA meeting? No wonder these people are alcoholics - I've never needed a drink more badly… — Chelsea Handler Copy Share Image
I had to accept that I was an alcoholic, that was the main thing. I think you've got to. But I try… — Paul Gascoigne Copy Share Image
I always say, "Never give your lead character an infant. Make them a recovering alcoholic, or the victim of a horrible violent… — Julie Plec Copy Share Image
I was court-ordered to Alcoholics Anonymous on television. Pretty much blows the hell out of the second A, wouldn't you say? — Paula Poundstone Copy Share Image
When I hear alcoholics talk about having their demons, I think that they're probably absolutely literally correct. — Alan Moore Copy Share Image
I haven't had an alcoholic drink in 22 years, but when I did drink I'd go for either Canadian whisky or Budweiser.… — Alice Cooper Copy Share Image
We waste days like mad blackbirds and pray for alcoholic nightsour silk-sick human smiles wrap around us like somebody else's confetti — Charles Bukowski Copy Share Image
The drivenness in any addiction is about the ruptured self, the belief that one is flawed as a person. The content of… — John Bradshaw Copy Share Image
I hope the reader's sense that I am deeply empathetic with the pain of being in a desperate marriage, but I also… — Gary Chapman Copy Share Image
A few years ago we colonised this place with some of our finest felons, thieves, muggers, alcoholics and prostitutes, a strain of… — Ian Wooldridge Copy Share Image
Suppose it was demonstrated that one out of twenty alcoholics could learn to become a moderate social drinker. The experienced clinician would… — Paul Samuelson Copy Share Image
Kools and Newports were for black people and lower-class whites. Camels were for procrastinators, those who wrote bad poetry, and those who… — David Sedaris Copy Share Image
How terrible to be alcoholic. You just want to quietly soothe and maybe poison yourself, but you end up poisoning those around… — Jonathan Ames Copy Share Image
I met [my editor] in a bar where alcoholic beverages are served and I bought her one and I told her the… — Daniel Handler Copy Share Image
“I’m telling you, the ingenuity of alcoholics is something else. If only it could be put to some kind of good use.… — Ozzy Osbourne Copy Share Image
People are broad-minded. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater, and even… — Art Buchwald Copy Share Image
Half of Wisconsinites are considered alcoholics. It's part of the culture of Wisconsin... if self-deprecation is their survival instinct, alcohol is their… — Amy Pietz Copy Share Image
The alcoholic and the drug addict harm only themselves by their behavior; the person who violates the rules of morality governing mans… — Ludwig von Mises Copy Share Image
“What the eff are you two alcoholics talking about? You're all hovering over each other like you're plotting to take over the… — Christine Zolendz Copy Share Image
I am an alcoholic, as I said. And it is however we call it, a disease. That's an explanation, but not an… — Malachy McCourt Copy Share Image
I told him about me being a summoner, and what that entailed. At the end of he simply gave a long sigh.… — Diana Rowland Copy Share Image
Being a functioning alcoholic is kind of like being a paraplegic lap dancer - you can do it, just not as well… — Robin Williams Copy Share Image
My parents were severe alcoholics. When I was about 17 years old, I finally left home. It wasn't a choice that I… — Ryan Bingham Copy Share Image
There's sometimes a weird benefit to having an alcoholic, violent father. He really motivated me in that I never wanted to be… — Dean Koontz Copy Share Image
Alcohol had a lot to do with it, too, and mental instability. All writers are narcissistic, manic-depressive drug addicts and alcoholics, and… — T.C. Boyle Copy Share Image
Alcoholic drinks, rightly used, are good for body and soul alike, but as a restorative of both there is nothing like brandy. — George Saintsbury Copy Share Image
You're not surprised when alcoholics act like alcoholics. It's more surprising when non-alcoholics start acting like alcoholics. — Carrie Fisher Copy Share Image
The golden sunshine of Italy congealed into tears. Here's to alcoholic brotherhood ... much more suited to the frail human soul, if… — Robert A. Heinlein Copy Share Image
He would have lied to himself as facilely as an alcoholic lies to himself to justify the 10 a.m. tumbler of vodka… — Peter Benchley Copy Share Image
An alcoholic father, poverty, my own juvenile diabetes, the limited English my parents spoke - although my mother has become completely bilingual… — Sonia Sotomayor Copy Share Image
Iran is celebrating the nuclear deal. The Iranians are going crazy. They're drinking non-alcoholic champagne and thinking about dancing. That's how excited… — Conan O'Brien Copy Share Image
I formed a new group called Alcoholics-Unanimous. If you don't feel like a drink, you ring another member and he comes over… — Richard Harris Copy Share Image
It is most absurdly said, in popular language, of any man, that he is disguised in liquor; for, on the contrary, most… — Thomas de Quincey Copy Share Image
An alcoholic will steal your wallet and lie to you. A drug addict will steal your wallet and then help you look… — David Sheff Copy Share Image
Multi-taskers often think they are like gym rats, bulking up their ability to juggle tasks, when in fact they are like alcoholics,… — Clay Shirky Copy Share Image
I've got a 15-year old son and a 10-year old daughter, and if they were going to do one of the following… — Pete Rose Copy Share Image
If you’re an alcoholic or a drug addict, we flirt with death. We pull ourselves to the brink of destruction and if… — Anthony Hopkins Copy Share Image
I would never become an alcoholic like my father because my father deserted us. But diseases, there's no let up. — Malachy McCourt Copy Share Image
It took a great deal of acceptance to come to terms with being an alcoholic but acceptance was the key to my… — Dennis Eckersley Copy Share Image
![“I met [my editor] in a bar where alcoholic beverages are served and I bought her one and I told her the idea. And she said that she liked it very much, which embarrassed me because I thought it meant that she was a lightweight and that in the morning, as so many women say to so many men, what…” quote by Daniel Handler](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/ac0/daniel-handler-1043_alcoholics_i-met-my-editor-in-a-bar-where-alcoholic_2914123.jpg)
