We're homebodies. I've gotten to see my kids' first steps, first smiles, first words. Every day is a weekend. — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
I was scared into being good. But I'm sure I did regular kid stuff. — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
I was pretty subdued [as a kid ] because I didn't want to get spanked, and I didn't want to go to Hell. — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
People always ask my mom what I did as a kid. My mom says, "He wasn't a bad kid. He was never… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
Doing a kid's movie is fun when you have kids. You don't want to do kids' movies if you don't have kids.… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
As I get older, the character evolves tremendously because I'm married and have kids now and realize certain things are not funny… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
Some guy came up to me with his kids, ages probably 10 and 12, and said that the reason he likes me… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
You learn a lot though when you have kids, I'll tell you what. Did you know when a baby poops its diapers,… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
The thing that's changed the way I do my stand-up act is having kids and getting older and wiser and smarter. There… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
When I was a kid down there it was always a dream to go to a Nebraska game but when you live… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
When I started doing my act, I wasn't married and didn't have kids. I was probably 29 years old. Some people say… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
MY ACT IS 'NOTHING BUT COMEDY. I TALK SOUTHERN BECAUSE I PICKED IT UP WHEN I MOVED TO THE SOUTH. IM NOT… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share Image
You learn a lot though when you have kids, I'll tell you what. Did you know when a baby poops its diapers, you're not… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
When you're doing comedy, it is so subjective. What is funny to you is not funny to another person. What is dirty to you… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
People always ask my mom what I did as a kid. My mom says, "He wasn't a bad kid. He was never an unruly… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
There's the old joke, "What's the difference between country and redneck? Well, that's three hundred dollars." — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I had a buddy of mine call up the other day, all upset 'cause he slept with his third cousin. And I'm like, Man,… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I've been down in Florida since 1979. When you're born in Nebraska you really can't explain it. — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I've been fortunate, I've been blessed, and I attribute my success to all my fans. People want to do things with you when you… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
As a comedian, I don't know if they're laughing because it's funny or if they're laughing at me because I'm not funny. And I'm… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I LOVE WAL-MART. I CONSIDER MY JOKES TO BE VERY JEUVINILLE. STUFF A 14 YEAR OLD WOULD LAUGH AT BECAUSE THATS THE SENCE OF… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I was born and raised in Pawnee City, Nebraska. I lived right next to the sale barn and I raised pigs. My dad was… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
What I do onstage, there's maybe .0001 percent of the population that acts like that. I talk like that because it makes me laugh,… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I don't take myself too seriously. I enjoy what I do. I enjoy making people laugh. — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
I don't have a lot of recreation time. I've always been under the assumption that if you're selling tickets you need to work. The… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
THE ONLY GOOD THING IS MY FANS LIKE ME AND COME TO SEE ME AND THATS ALL THAT MATTERS. EVERYBODY ELSE CAN KISS MY… — Larry the Cable Guy Copy Share
![“I was pretty subdued [as a kid ] because I didn't want to get spanked, and I didn't want to go to Hell.” quote by Larry the Cable Guy](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/a2a/larry-the-cable-guy-5028_go-to-hell_i-was-pretty-subdued-as-a-kid-because-i_1828720.jpg)
