I loved Omar Vizquel. He tells some really long jokes, and he has his own way of telling them, but he can… — Steve Finley Copy Share Image
I was never a joke teller. I don't even like jokes, for the most part. I don't like to hear them, and… — Ed O'Neill Copy Share Image
I don't like it when I see a racist comedian go up and say, 'What are we gonna do about all these… — Ricky Gervais Copy Share Image
I definitely have friends who gave me a tag for a joke I already had. Like, 'Here's another line.' A tag is,… — Chris Cubas Copy Share Image
The brain process that results in a joke materializing where no joke was before remains a mystery. I'm not aware of any… — Dick Cavett Copy Share Image
Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. I may joke about knowing fear, but the fact is, the first… — Harlan Coben Copy Share Image
“The sun is a joke. Oranges can’t titillate their jaded palates. Nothing can ever be violent enough to make taut their slack… — Nathanael West Copy Share Image
Thank you people that are laughing with your hand away from your mouth. That joke is clearly not for everyone, but I… — Daniel Tosh Copy Share Image
I'd been writing sketches since high school, but 'Friends of the People' really taught me about structure - how to wait out… — Jermaine Fowler Copy Share Image
We are constantly being showered by little blood clots, but if you have PFO and a little blood clot gets to your… — Terry Dubrow Copy Share Image
“Dude, estoy aqui por loco, no por pendejo," which was the punch line to the funniest Spanish joke I knew. Okay, the… — Cory Doctorow Copy Share Image
I have "come back" [to music scene] so many times, people are just like, Is this another one?... It's kind of like… — Britney Spears Copy Share Image
Historically, Heathrow has been something of a joke, outweighed by its excellent connections. We have to aspire to having an airport at… — Philip Hammond Copy Share Image
Loretta Lynn, Tammy Wynette, Dolly Parton and I were the first female headliners, where we would book our own opening acts. Before… — Barbara Mandrell Copy Share Image
Sometimes my brother and I - we're twins, and sometimes we joke that we're like a two-headed monster. We can be hard… — Aaron Dessner Copy Share Image
It's easy to play fun forms, surfaces, and languages against each other. Teenagers do this every day, producing winning memes from random… — Torbjørn Rødland Copy Share Image
“What was this past summer to you?” Cinderella said, stalking back and forth like an angry mountain cat. “A joke? A way… — K.M. Shea Copy Share Image
You've noticed that same joke told by two different people, once works, and the other time doesn't, simply because how the person… — Abbas Kiarostami Copy Share Image
I believe it is tough to be funny and tougher to make people laugh. And it needs to be been done effortlessly.… — Vivek Oberoi Copy Share Image
My friends are people who like building cool stuff. We always have this joke about people who want to just start companies… — Mark Zuckerberg Copy Share Image
If you're showing people where it's smooth sailing, where is the joke? If you go back to any movie, even a conventional… — Christopher Guest Copy Share Image
I joke to people in the press that I realize I'm not black, I'm actually white. But I've got these roots in… — Glenn Hughes Copy Share Image
Everybody I know who is funny, it's in them. You can teach timing, or some people are able to tell a joke,… — Carol Burnett Copy Share Image
When you become fluent with language, it means you can write an entry in your journal or tell a joke to someone… — Mitchel Resnick Copy Share Image
“Many obese people spend a significant amount of their energy on suppressing the urge to tell some of the people who are… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
The joke I wanted to put into one of the promos for this new season, was to have a guy come up… — Tony Danza Copy Share Image
People talk, 'Oh your father's a misogynist, look what he said about women,' like, on 'Howard Stern.' When he gets with Howard… — Donald Trump, Jr Copy Share Image
Dealing with in-laws is like walking down a dark hallway with a bucket of industrial-strength glue sitting in the shadows. If you're… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I don’t even pretend to believe I know everything; I just believe in arguments God told me I had a pretty good… — Shannon L. Alder Copy Share Image
She can be Mary Poppins but she can also be - I would never use the word 'crude' in the same sentence… — Nicholas Hammond Copy Share Image
There's a joke in economics about the drunk who loses his keys in the street but only looks for them under the… — Christina Romer Copy Share Image
Everything was meant to wind people up [in Make It Big ]. I don't know why we had this great pleasure in… — George Michael Copy Share Image
“Finding out that you are not your lover’s only lover hurts, but not as much as discovering that you are the side… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
You get used to such micro-aggressions, those sneaky remarks. Especially in comedy: when the mood is meant to be light you can… — Rose Matafeo Copy Share Image
“We are sometimes depressed by our failure to convince people who strongly believe that we are that we are definitely not depressed.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
I think it's really important to be kind, especially to people whose lives are grim - I try hard to cheer people… — Jo Brand Copy Share Image
“Thanks for turning off the lights... and so far... it's your problem, you are getting in trouble... it's not me... so far… — Deyth Banger Copy Share Image
The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved… — Billy Connolly Copy Share Image
I don't really do anything unless it's from the heart - I don't like to joke on people, or distract them from… — Lil B Copy Share Image
Once you start thinking about it in a mercenary frame of mind, then you're finished. You're a joke, because there are too… — Tommy Shaw Copy Share Image
![“I have "come back" [to music scene] so many times, people are just like, Is this another one?... It's kind of like a joke to me now.” quote by Britney Spears](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/019/britney-spears-1356_joke_i-have-come-back-to-music-scene-so-many_160910.jpg)
![“Everything was meant to wind people up [in Make It Big ]. I don't know why we had this great pleasure in winding people up, but we really did think they would get the joke. And it backfired on us.” quote by George Michael](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/451/george-michael-1332_bigs_everything-was-meant-to-wind-people-up-i_3041225.png)
