My dad said to me son you must always tell the truth to be a better man unless if I want to… — Sikhwetha Maanda Stanley Copy Share Image
“You're asking the cyborg fugitive and the wild animal to be the welcoming committee? That's adorable.” — Marissa Meyer Copy Share Image
Money may not buy you happiness, but it does buy you all the shit you want!.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Yesterday is a pile of rubble. Today is a pile of opportunity. Life takes a new dump each morning” — Ryan Lilly Copy Share Image
We've reached the age where we can't function without our glasses. Especially if they're empty...Cheers!!.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“I am in the prime of my womanhood, nunga-nungas poised and trembling (attractively). Lips puckered up and in peak condition for a… — Louise Rennison Copy Share Image
You just think you got game because You slept with your high school teacher.. but I won't bother to bring up the… — Carlin Whisler Copy Share Image
“I suppose I could get a job to have something to do, but working when I don't have to work would be… — Stephen Reid Andrews Copy Share Image
“GPS has saved countless relationships because us men do not like to ask for directions. Now if women could only come with… — Ken Poirot Copy Share Image
Kissing a woman at her FOREHEAD is respect, at her LIPS is Love, CHEEK is Heroism, and NECK is Lust. BUT KISSING… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My Face book gave too me, 12 stupid bitches, 11 fake friends, 10 FB hackings, 9 new sins 8 play dates, 7… — Denver Mc Copy Share Image
“A professional headshot in front of a bookshelf says you're an intellectual. A professional headshot peeking though a bookshelf says you're probably… — Ryan Lilly Copy Share Image
Oh, you hate when guys stare at your boobs? You should call the police and report the person who ripped your top… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? I don't know, I have DirectTV. — Alfonso Martinez Copy Share Image
“Your wife is smarter than you; know this, and you will live happily ever after.” — Matshona Dhliwayo Copy Share Image
I hate when they use fake dinosaurs in movies.. I can always tell... — Carlin Whisler Copy Share Image
Dear Romeo, my death isn't the only thing I've been faking!..Sincerely, Juliet. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People who wait for 4 hours to reply to text messages with LOL should be shot!.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Don't worry, I won't tell anyone...and if I do, I'll tell them not to tell anyone!.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I like to put things back where I got them from when I am done using them...so I dropped your mom off… — Carlin Whisler Copy Share Image
Wondering why somebody didn't text back, then realizing you didn't even send the text!.. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Funny is when someone talking bad about your style and few days after, they just copy your style! — Angela Jennifer Aroemrasni Copy Share Image
Mr.crockery twitchen cause he can't take what I'm mixing (fairly odd parents) — Cassius Quantrell Ellison Copy Share Image
“An angry wife can be more frightening than an army of disgruntled soldiers.” — Matshona Dhliwayo Copy Share Image
Never Mind. Definition: You should've listened the first 5 times, bitch. — Alfonso Martinez Copy Share Image
I cant even wish u get everything whatever u want cuz I know m also SOMETHING in ur EVERYTHING :P — Komal Copy Share Image
I wanna go to seaworld With a fishing pole just to see what peoples reactions would be — Carlin Whisler Copy Share Image
