The Bible has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a thousand lies. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The Church has opposed every innovation and discovery from the day of Galileo down to our own time, when the use of… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
The so-called Christian nations are the most enlightened and progressive ... but in spite of their religion, not because of it. The… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
I was educated, I was trained, I was a Presbyterian and I knew how these things are done. I knew that in… — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
More than two hundred death penalties are gone from the law books, but the [biblical] texts that authorised them remain. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
Sing like no one's listening, love like you've never been hurt, dance like nobody's watching, and live like its heaven on earth. — Mark Twain Copy Share
If you had made the acquiring of ignorance the study of your life, you could not have graduated with higher honor than you could… — Mark Twain Copy Share
“The Creator sat upon the throne, thinking. Behind him stretched the illimitable continent of heaven, steeped in a glory of light and color; before… — Mark Twain Copy Share
A man accustomed to American food and American domestic cookery would not starve to death suddenly in Europe, but I think he would gradually… — Mark Twain Copy Share
I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get… — Mark Twain Copy Share
The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get… — Mark Twain Copy Share
“As far as I can see, Italy, for fifteen hundred years, has turned all her energies, all her finances, and all her industry to… — Mark Twain Copy Share
Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July; and as a rule they don't know what happened on either… — Mark Twain Copy Share
If we could imagine such a man, that is a man who could invent the fly and send him out on his mission and… — Mark Twain Copy Share
You perceive, now, that these things are all impossible except in a dream. You perceive that they are pure and puerile insanities, the silly… — Mark Twain Copy Share
Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. — Mark Twain Copy Share