Brutal Quote by Todd Barry

If someone's a nurse and they're going to the Comedy Cellar on a Thursday night and they paid $30 and a two-drink minimum to…

— Sarah Sherman

You have to pay your dues. And what's nice, after booking a lot of new people... I counted the other day. We're in September…

— Scott Aukerman

So I'll go eat places and then I'll run it off in the show.

— Christy Romano

Some venues are better run than others. Sometimes it's just maddening to deal with full dinners being served in front of your face. You…

— Todd Barry

On 'Friday,' I had a big trailer, and we would have a barbecue going and music playing. It was a fun set. There was…

— Mike Epps

The thing that's the biggest bummer about any live show is a hot, sober room. So if it's during the day and people are…

— Nick Kroll

The way I look at it, people pay me to travel. Once we get to the stage, that part is easy.

— Dianne Reeves

What happens is we finish the show, have a couple of drinks, go back to the hotel, talk, and that's it.

— Ian Gillan

The first paid show was in Los Angeles at an art opening and I was paid maybe, I don't know, twenty five bucks?

— Devendra Banhart

When I'm doing shows I don't need much from a city. All I'm looking for is a good meal and a decent spot to…

— Hannibal Buress

There's a lot of people who don't understand the touring and the party scene and it's like, go to bed late, wake up early,…

— Sam Hughes

It's easier to cancel a show if it's expensive.

— Louis C. K