Parenting Quote by Timothy J. Keller
““I cannot live up to my parents’ standards – and that makes me feel terrible. I cannot live up to your standards – and that makes me feel terrible. I cannot live up to society’s standards – and that makes me feel terrible. I cannot live up to other societies’ standards – that makes me feel terrible. Perhaps the solution is to set my own standards? But I cannot keep them either – and that makes me feel terrible, unless I set incredibly low standards. Are low standards a solution? Not at all. That makes me feel terrible because I realize I am the type of person who has low standards. Trying to boost our self-esteem by trying to live up to our own standards or someone else’s is a trap. It is not an answer.””
About This Quote
Source Book: The Reason for God, Timothy J. Keller, 2008
Feeling terrible when you can't meet external expectations, and setting low personal standards only deepens dissatisfaction.
In simple terms: Struggling with expectations and low self‑standards.
Key Takeaway
Create realistic, personal standards and accept imperfection.
Themes
self‑esteem
expectations
identity
mental health
growth
Mood
reflective
anxious
determined
Type
advice
philosophical
When to use this quote
- personal goal setting
- therapy sessions
- career planning
- relationship boundaries
Key Concepts
psychology
self‑compassion
values
Questions to Reflect On
- What standards truly reflect your values?
- How can you balance ambition with self‑acceptance?
A Different Perspective
Low standards may become a self‑fulfilling prophecy, limiting achievement.
