Workplace-wisdom Quote by Stuart MacBride

“Nobody touches my ding dongs!”

— Ray S. Jones

“He was a detective, but he didn’t detect anything. It fell into his lap, already broken, every time.”

— Jodi Picoult

“One of the police found a garden chair that I could stand on and they eyed me suspiciously as I tried to slide through…

— Tom Reynolds

“If I shake your hand, will I get my fingerprints all over your fingertips? I hope not. Otherwise the crime scene, and the shaft…

— Jarod Kintz

“I recorded the ding-dong sound that shoplifting sensors at the doors of Wal-Mart make. Now I just stand at the exit and press play…

— Jarod Kintz

“The perfectly measured burr of a dispassionate detective had suddenly changed into the explosive boom of a take-no-shit street cop. Suffice it to say,…

— Cleo Coyle

“My skin cleared up! I don't have a single zit." -Tommy Ding, ding, ding," Jody onomatopeed, signaling that Tommy had hit on the correct…

— Christopher Moore

“I'd like to give these detective story writers a course of routine work. They'd soon learn how most things are untraceable and nobody ever…

— Agatha Christie

“What was that for?” “Fingerprints. I’m not wastin’ time explainin’ to cops why six inches of steel went into a dumbass.”

— Randall Kenneth Drake

“I used his severed hand as a murder weapon. I hope I didn’t get my fingerprints on his fingerprints.”

— Jarod Kintz

“I write a note and tape it to my window-- I'M NOT A DETECTIVE. BE SPECIFIC!”

— Lisa Schroeder

“Walter and Bell glanced at each other, neither one relishing the idea of being the brave hero who found the escaped tiger in the…

— Christa Faust