““So he put on the fanciest things in his closet: a stiff and itchy white shirt; a black necktie bound noose-tight; black slacks that popped with static electricity when he moved; a shiny pair of dress shoes that he shoehorned himself into, so granite-hard that they removed a layer of skin on his heel He wondered why adults felt they needed to be at their most uncomfortable for their most cherished events.””