Quote by Mike Gregory

““For all who are infatuated with Olympic Curling, be sure check your local listings for the Paint Drying World Championships later this year.””

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More by Mike Gregory

“Next person who says "it's not the heat, it's the humidity" will learn that it's not my fist, but the impact.”

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Dear Pringles, Now that I am no longer a child, I can no longer fit my hand inside your tube of deliciousness. Work on…

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“The Apple store had a sign in the window: "Apply within." Well duh, what else is it going to be? Orangy?”

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“says- Last night, I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and thought to myself, Where the heck is the…

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“If someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles to frown BUT only 4 muscles to extend yr arm & bitch-slap that mother@/?"er! ”

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“is wondering if the queen pulls the duvet up so you can only see her head, then says "Look Philip i'm a stamp!".”

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