Psychology Quote by Javier Marías
““IN ALL UNEQUAL relationships, those lacking a name or explicit recognition, there is usually one person who takes the initiative, who phones to suggest meeting up, while the other person has just two possibilities or ways of reaching the same goal of not fading away or vanishing, even though he or she believes that, whatever happens, this is sure to be his or her final fate. One way is simply to wait and do nothing, trusting that eventually the other person will miss you, that your silence and absence will become unexpectedly unbearable or even worrying, because we all very quickly grow accustomed to what is given to us or what is there.””
About This Quote
Source Novel: Your Face Tomorrow, 2002
In unequal, unnamed relationships, one party often initiates contact while the other passively waits, hoping the initiator will miss them, which can trap both in a cycle of unspoken expectations.
In simple terms: One person pushes, the other waits, creating a silent stalemate.
Key Takeaway
Break the pattern by communicating openly.
Themes
relationships
power dynamics
communication
Mood
introspective
hopeful
Type
advice
philosophical
When to use this quote
- dating
- friendships
- family ties
- workplace collaborations
Key Concepts
psychology
social behavior
attachment theory
Questions to Reflect On
- What would happen if the passive partner initiated contact?
- How can both parties express needs without fear?
A Different Perspective
Relying on silence can reinforce insecurity and misinterpretation.
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