Alternatives Quote by Gloria Steinem
“If you look at many of the women who find themselves with cold, distant, difficult, cruel men, it's because they had cold, distant, difficult, cruel fathers who made them feel that there was no alternative or, at a minimum, who made them choose someone like their father in order to change in this other man what they couldn't change in their fathers.”
About This Quote
Source Book: Outrageous Women, 1999
Women often repeat paternal patterns, choosing partners who mirror their fathers because they see it as the only familiar option.
In simple terms: Women choose partners similar to their fathers.
Key Takeaway
Recognize and break repeating family patterns.
Themes
relationships
family dynamics
psychology
Mood
reflective
hopeful
serious
Type
advice
psychological
observational
When to use this quote
- dating
- therapy
- self‑reflection
- personal growth
Key Concepts
attachment theory
repetition compulsion
family systems
Questions to Reflect On
- What patterns from your upbringing influence your partner choices?
- How can you create new relational models?
A Different Perspective
Changing deep‑seated patterns can be painful and may meet resistance from both self and partner.
![“[...] I was created by cruel men. Not in a lab, not in a test tube, but through years of undeserved mistreatment at a time in life that's supposed to be magical. Early adulthood. Newfound freedom, newfound love.” quote by Steph Sweeney](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/b1d/steph-sweeney-279504_freedom_i-was-created-by-cruel-men-not-in-a-lab_1682011.jpg)
![“[When asked how it felt to be a female prime minister:] I don't know: I've never experienced the alternative.” quote by Margaret Thatcher](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/324/margaret-thatcher-463_alternatives_when-asked-how-it-felt-to-be-a-female-pr_15081.jpg)
