First time Quote by Gayle Forman
““It's okay,' he tells me. 'If you want to go. Everyone wants you to stay. I want you to stay more than I've ever wanted anything in my life.' His voice cracks with emotion. He stops, clears his throat, takes a breath, and continues. 'But that's what I want and I could see why it might not be what you want. So I just wanted to tell you that I understand if you go. It's okay if you have to leave us. It's okay if you want to stop fighting.' For the first time since I realized that Teddy was gone, too, I feel something unclench. I feel myself breathe. I know that Gramps can't be that late-inning pinch hitter I'd hoped for. He won't unplug my breathing tube or overdoes me with morphine or anything like that. But this is the first time today that anyone has acknowledged what I have lost. I know that the social worker warned Gran and Gramps not to upset me, but Gramps's recognition, and the permission he just offered me--it feels like a gift. Gramps doesn't leave me. He slumps back into the chair. It's quiet now. So quiet you can almost hear other people's dreams. So quiet that you can almost hear me tell Gramps, 'Thank you.””
About This Quote
Source Novel: If I Stay by Gayle Forman, 2009
A grieving person learns that acceptance and permission to feel loss can be a healing gift.
In simple terms: Acknowledging loss helps heal.
Key Takeaway
Allow yourself to feel.
Themes
grief
acceptance
communication
healing
Mood
somber
reflective
Type
narrative
emotional
When to use this quote
- hospital bedside
- family loss
- therapy sessions
- support groups
Key Concepts
Attachment theory
emotional intelligence
mortality
Questions to Reflect On
- What does permission to grieve look like for you?
- How can you support others in their loss?
A Different Perspective
Grieving may still be painful despite acceptance.
![“There's very little in the substance of [THE LADY IN THE VAN] which is not fact though some adjustments have had to be made. Over the years Miss Shepherd was visited by a succession of social workers so the character in the play is a composite figure. . . . A composite too are the neighbours…” quote by Alan Bennett](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/3e7/alan-bennett-1922_adjustment_there-s-very-little-in-the-substance-of_239144.jpg)
