Spike Milligan Quotes
59 quotes
in 596 categories
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I told you I was sick.
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We haven't got a plan so nothing can go wrong!
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One day the "Don't Knows" will get in and then where will we be?
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It was a perfect marrige. She didn`t want to and he couldn`t
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My father confused me. From the ages of one to seven, I thought my name was Jesus Christ!
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Its all in the mind, you know.
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In India a farmhand was caught in the act with his cow. He said he had bad eyesight and thought it was his wife.
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Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, get it out with Optrex.
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My father was my greatest inspiration. He was a lunatic.
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Life is a long agonized illness only curable by death.
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Many people die of thirst but the Irish are born with one.
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Any man can be 62, but it takes a bus to be 62A
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I cannot stand being awake, the pain is too much.
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I have got so low that I have asked to be hospitalized and for deep narcosis (sleep). I cannot stand being awake. The pain is…
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Aristocrats have heirs, the poor have children, and the rest keep dogs.
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The most difficult book I have ever read was a manual on the use of iron bangles by A.J. Thompson.
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This silent call you make, A silence so loud I fear the world knows it's meaning If you fill every corner of a room Where…
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Listen, someone's screaming in agony- fortunately I speak it fluently
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Never return to a doctor whose office plants have died. After five days in hospital, I took a turn for the nurse.
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I'm Irish. We think sideways
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